You jokes
What do you call someone with a pindie spot?
Stop screen recording.
One day I was jogging through the park and I saw this lady sitting next to a pond in a wheelchair with no legs and arms and said "Why are you crying" she said she had never been hugged I gave her a hug and jogged away.The next day i saw her again and asked her the same question she said "I've never been kissed" I gave her a kiss and went, The third day i asked her thrice and she said I've never been fucked I picked her up from her wheelchair and throwed her in the pond and said your fucked now She didn't make it:)
Why are Japanese people's eyes so squinted?
Do you know how bright an atomic bomb is?
Do you wanna hear the gossip about butter?
Actually, I shouldn't spread it.
You gotta hand it to blind prostitutes.
What do you call a nut on a wheelchair?....A busted nut.
What do you call a feminine cow?
A dairy queen.
You want to hear some marriage jokes?
Don't worry, it's just a couple.
Jack and Jill went up a hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high, pulled down his fly, and said, "Jill do you wanna?" Jill said yes, pulled up her dress, and then they had some fun. But stupid Jill forgot the pill so now they have a son.
A girl and her brother are walking in their garden. POV: Brother. Sister: "Why are you cutting those flowers?"
Brother: "Because they're beautiful!"
Sister: "I thought you said you cut yourself because you aren't."
Brother:......
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot wheels.
Have you ever noticed when a woman is pregnant, all her friends touch her stomach and say "congrats," but none of them touch the man's penis and say "well done?"
So, I had an orphan friend, and he asked me, "How's your girlfriend?" I said, "I don't have one." He said, "I know, I just wanted to remind you." Then I asked, "How are your parents?" After that, I never saw him again.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
My asian neighbors dinner.
What do you call two transgender midgets having sex?
A microtransaction.
Did you hear about the fire in the shoe factory?
Many soles were lost.
What do you call a redneck sister who runs faster than her brothers?
A virgin.
When me and my friend went to the market, my friend tried to scan my arm, and I asked her what she was doing. She answered, "Oh, I had to buy you so I don't steal you."
Therapist: So what brought you here today?
Wife: He's too literal.
Therapist: And you, sir?
Husband: My truck.
What do you call an epileptic in a lettuce field?
Seizure salad.