You jokes
What do you call a U.S. border hopper?
A Mexican jumping bean.
What do you call a rich Asian?
A cha-ching.
Scientists say a banana a day is great for the colon.
But you gotta eat it!
Motivational Quote for today: If you're feeling tired and ugly today, cheer up, you probably won't feel tired tomorrow morning...
Two terrorists walk into a bar.
The bartender asks what they are talking about. Terrorist 1 says, "We are going to kill 14k people and a donkey."
The Bartender asks, "Why a donkey?"
Then Terrorist 2 says, "See, I told you no one would care about the 14k people."
Memes
I’m not calling you a slut, I’m calling you a penny.
Two-faced, worthless, and in everyone’s pants!
What do you call a fart in a gay bar?
A mating call.
Did you know Paul Walker had dandruff?
Neither did I until I found his Head and Shoulders in the glove compartment.
What do you call a group of black men hanging from a tree?
Alabama wind chimes.
Did you know that a majority of the U.S. is afraid of the dark?
Especially if they are right behind you at the ATM.
Why do lesbians shop at Sports Authority? Because they don’t like dicks.
The other day I went to a museum. My friend and I went to the Holocaust section, and he got choked up when he saw the Anne Frank picture. I asked him, "Why are you sad? It's just an ashtray."
How do you get a white girl to suck your dick?
Put ranch dressing on it.
Your teeth are so yellow, you spit butter!
Like and comment if you play Fortnite!
You look sexy with that rope around your neck.
(Bully) Boy, you ugly!
(Me) Boy, shut up, that's why your hairline start at the back of your head.
Roses are red, Violets are fine, You can be the six, And I can be the nine.
Did you see that Chinese man with no legs?
No, I'm blind.
Stop ruining my jokes.
Isn't that the Chinese man with no legs' fault?
It's not like He Go Ann Hi Weh.
Girlfriend: "Would you still love me if I was a figment of your imagination?"
My schizophrenic ass: Of course I would.