Dishwasher Jokes

Wife: (on phone) hi Husband: hey I didn’t know dishwashers talk and make me a sandwich.

Knock knock!! Whos there?? Dishwasher!! Dishwasher who?? Dishwasher way i used to talk when i got my head kicked in

My girlfriend told me the dishwasher was leaking so I brought home some tampons

wo(man) fe(male) we(men)

dishwash(her)

yo so poor that your wash your paper plates and cutlerly in a kids dishwasher

I was in class and we had to chose another term for words we use everyday, for kid I chose child for dig I chose pet and for wife I chose dishwasher

Marriage is really educational

When I was single, I didn't even know there was a wrong way to put a fork in the dishwasher.

How do you make a dishwasher work again? Smack her ass and say "get back to work!"

What do you call a woman covered in mud? A dirty dishwasher.

Remember back in the day when your TV wouldn't work so you'd bang it a few times?

I tried that with my dishwasher, but unfortunately, she ended up pregnant...

Dishwasher rape is another word for marital obligations.

Mom:Dont forget to unload the dishwasher

Mom:did you finish ur homework?

Mom:We are going to ur grandmothers house for thanksgiving

Mom:Dad and i talked we are getting a new car next month

Son:u are?? oh my gosh thank you

Mom:No i was just making sure you were getting my texts

Son:that was cruel

There was a big problem yesterday. My dishwasher has stop working, her visa had expired.

How do you turn a dishwasher into a snow plow?

Give her a shovel.

My kids are so ungrateful. I got them a new dishwasher and they just won't stop complaining about their mom

Where do you buy a dishwasher. Hot singles in your area