You jokes
What do you call a warrior that's going to bed?
A knight knight.
What do you call an act of “funny” discipline? A PUN-ishment!
What do you call a Mexican that lost his car?
Carlos.
What happens when you are playing Undertale, but it's snowy in town? It SNOWED in town!
If someone calls you dirty minded just say:
"You are dirty minded as well if you understand what I'm saying."
Memes
What do you get when I get mixed with coffee?
De-presso.
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was running from you, hehe.
Do you want to buy my Hoover?
I mean... it's just collecting dust.
What do you do with a dead chemist?
You Ni-tro-gen!
What did Gandalf say to Mario? "You shall not pass!"
My boy, I think it is about time that I leave this world. Now draw your weapon and kill me now!
*draws a picture of his "epic" sword*
"What... WHAT... WTH ARE YOU DOING SIMPLETON? I DIDN'T MEAN THAT KIND OF DRAW!"
What do you call a Chinese man in the summer heat? Boi Ling.
If you're fat and transgender, then would you be considered trans fat?
You're so scary that even your hairline ran away.
Dagger. This is to get your attention, for Dagger Jr. and I. We'd like to speak with you, and possibly Lynx, if we can find a time to all talk.
If having sex for money makes you a wh*re, then what does having sex for free make you?
Non-profit wh*reganisation.
Did you know that people say Michael Jackson only became a pedophile when he was white?
Lucky for him, if he was black he would have been found guilty.
What do you call 4 black guys and 2 white guys?
The Oreo Gang!
Why don’t old people have sex?
When was the last time you tried pulling apart a grilled cheese that old?
Everyone: You gotta pay the cost to be the boss.
Germans: You gotta be the caust to be the boss.