So I was going out the door and I see me dwarf neighbour at the bus stop, I ask if he needs a lift. He replies with fu.. off. So I zip up my backpack and keep going to work
Teacher: what's your favorite animal
Me: Desert Eagle
Teacher:why?
Me:cause it fits in my backpack
My Llama's cousin sucks at going on vacation.
He just stands there; "I'll pack uhhhh...."
Muslim child to his mother "mom why is my backpack so heavy ?" Mom: "allah akbar my son allah akbar"
When the teacher gives me a F on my exam
But I have a AK-47 in my backpack
*is honestly the best policy*
A kindergarten class is learning about the alphabet. The teacher asked, "What comes after M?" Little Timmy reached into his backpack and yelled "16!"
There's a plane going down over the desert with only 3 parachutes on board. There are four people onboard, the smartest man in the world, the best doctor in the world, an old priest, and a young nerd. The doctor says, "People need me for my medical skills." grabs the first parachute pack, and jumps. The smartest man in the world says, "People need me for my intelligence." grabs a pack, and jumps. The old priest says, "I have lived a long and happy life. You take the last chute." The nerd says, "Don't worry. There are enough chutes for the both of us. The smartest man in the world just grabbed my backpack."
Chrome turns you into chrome but there is a chrome back bling and it does nothing to you
Francis Pope, Donald Trump, Barack Obama, and a little boy were one a falling airplane. Their were 3 parachutes. Donald Trump grabs the first parachute and jumps off the plane saying, “The world needs my leadership!” Barack Obama grabs a parachute and says, “I need to help make choices for our world”, so he jumps off the plane. At this point, the Pope and the little boy are on the plane. The Pope says to the boy, “take the last parachute, I am too old and I’m going to die soon one day.” The little boy says, “actually their are two, you see, Donald Trump took my backpack.”
A plane is going to crash there are four passengers and only three parachutes. all the staff are safe and are gone, leaving the passengers. Ryan Reynolds is the first he says, my fans need me and jumps, Donald trump takes another and says I am the smartest president, jumps, leaving one. There is a pope and a boy left. The pope says child, my life is over and yours has just begun, take the last parachute. The boy replies don't worry - Donald took my backpack.
This isn't a joke, just an American back to school list. 1.Pencils 2.Binders 3.Paper 4.Pencil sharpener What, did you think I was going to make a school shooter joke?
Gun + Backpack = Fun
A student got a bad lettered grade so the next day he came back with his own lettered grade in his backpack an A....... K47
I asked my midget neighbour if he wanted a lift. He told m to "Fuck of!!!"! I thought what a cheeky cunt and zipped my backpack up and walked away.
There are 4 people ona plane while its crashing and there are only 3 parachutes theres opera, Obama a little girl and, Trump opera grabs. Parachute and says, "I'm famous i get one" And Trump grabs one and says, "Well im president of cource i get one" and obama looks at the little girl and says, "Since your the future or our generation take the last one" the little girl hugs obama and says, "Actually we can both have one Trump took my backpack"
There are 4 people on a airplane and the pilot has a heart attack and dies the plane is going down and there are also only 3 parachutes so the guy who knows how to cure cancer says I’m jumping I can save many lives the the 46 president joe Biden says I’m take ing the 2 one so there is only one left Donald trump says to the 7 year old girl I have lived a long life u an take the next one so the little girl says that’s ok the 46 president took my back pack.lol
The greatest Doctor, smartest man, young geek, and inspiring preacher are on a plane. The pilot dies of a heart attack, and is confirmed by the doctor. But, there are only 3 parachutes on the plane. The doctor takes one and says,
"People need me for my excellent medicine!" and jumps out. The smart man grab one and shouts,
"People are in need of my great knowledge!" and jumps out. There is only one more parachute on the plane. The preacher says to the geek,
"You are to young. Take the final parachute and go." The geek instead says,
"No, there are two parachutes left, the 'smart' one took my backpack."
You know that at Walmart they have backpacks next to the guns? Well I thought that it was nice to see the bags next to the school supplies.
Yo momma so fat that she don't need a backpack. She keeps her things in her lagrangian points.
The at three people in a plane it is about to crash there is trump,Obama,nine year old girl, but only 2 para- soots Obama says "oh my I need one I need to protect my family" so he jumps off! Trump says "oh I am the smartest man in the world I must take it" so he jumps off 9 year old- welp I guess he took my school backpack" :) so she leaves the plane! What a good ending
