You jokes
What do you call an autistic black man with a rifle?
Black ops.
Guy: Whose place? Mine or yours?
Girl: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Are you a white van? Because I would love to put children in you.
What do you call a basement full of SJW's?
A whine cellar.
"You raise me up to stand on mountains," said the dwarf pornstar on my penis.
What do you call an Indian lesbian?
Mingeeta.
Dad: What did you learn in school today?
Timmy: Not enough, I guess, 'cause I gotta go back tomorrow.
I have a pun, but I will nut tell you!
Don't you just hate it when your grandmas always complaining about things getting stuck between her false teeth, like my foreskin?
Mom: You will make me kill myself.
Me who has cut first: I'll kill myself ✨first✨!
My mom tells me and my sister to stop fighting. "Mom! You and Dad need to stop!"
A teacher says, "If you have one dollar and your parents give you 5 dollars, how much do you have?"
Everyone raised their hands except for a little girl in the front, but the teacher called on her anyway.
The girl said, "My parents left me, so I would have one dollar."
A pair of cows were talking in the field. One says, "Have you heard about the mad cow disease that's going around?"
"Yeah," the other cow says. "Makes me glad I'm a penguin."
What do you call a Pirate Pokemon?
Arrrrrr-ceus!
What does a mother fear most?
Hearing "YOU ARE NOT THE FATHER!" for 5 different men.
What do you say to a depressed special kid?
“Why so down?”
A son tells his father, "I have an imaginary girlfriend."
The father sighs and says, "You know, you could do better."
"Thanks Dad," the son says.
The father shakes his head and goes, "I was talking to your girlfriend."
Grandpa: "Sonny, let me tell you something. There's only one damn thing in this whole world worse than Alzheimer's."
Boy: "What's that?"
Grandpa: "What's what?"
Do you like pudding? Pudding deez nuts in your mouth!
Hey, Reaper!!! Where are you going?
"I finished my job."
What about me?