You jokes
What do you call a bus full of transgender men? T-Mobile.
I was in a library and a black guy came up to me.
"Where's the coloured printer?" he said.
"Mate, it's 2025, you can use any printer you want," I replied.
Did you hear about the guy who got fired for having sex with his clients?
He was a great veterinarian.
Did you hear about the new sex doll they've invented for Muslims?
It blows itself up!!
During a discussion at Sunday school, a nun asks the children what they think God takes you by when you die. A kid responds, "I think God takes you by your feet, because once I walked into my parents' room and my mom's feet were in the air and she was screaming, "Oh God, I'm coming!!!"
What do you call an emo kid's suicide live stream?
America's funniest home videos.
Are you an orphanage?
Why?
Because I wanna put my kids in you.
You: "Captain, where is this plane going?"
Captain: "New York, 175 Greenwich Street."
What's the best thing about Alzheimer's?
You can hide your own Easter Eggs!
Friend: Want to play Fall Guys?
Friend 2: Yup.
Friend: Ok, so let me ju- wait, where are you going?
Friend 2: I'm gonna jump off.
Friend: Why?
Friend 2: We are playing Fall Guys, right?
What do you call a white girl having a seizure? A vanilla shake.
What happens when you make an asían girl squirt?
She charges you 10 cents for extra sauce.
I would tell you a joke about unemployed people, but they don’t really work.
What do you call a skeleton who went out in the snow? A numb skull!
If mistakes make people human, then your parents must have been alligators before you were born.
Man to woman: "Would you sleep with me for one million dollars?"
Woman: "Sure."
Man: "How about for ten dollars?"
Woman: "What do you think I am?"
Man: "We’ve already established what you are. All we’re doing is negotiating price."
billie: hi.
me: You wanna hear a story?
billie: Yes, sure.
me: Once upon a time, I ran over your dog last night.
Son: Dad, do you remember your first blowjob?
Dad: Ohhh yeah, I do!
Son: How did it taste?
Dad: Get out.
How do you confuse Helen Keller? You rearrange the furniture and glue doorknobs to the walls.
What do you call an autistic kid with a glock?
Special forces.
Btw, I'm 13.