Islam jokes
Islamic pubs and bars are the worst.
You can't drink alcohol or dance.
Women can get stoned though, no questions asked.
Q: Why did the islamic chicken cross the road?
A: To get to the airport.
Did you hear about the new sex doll they've invented for Muslims?
It blows itself up!!
How does a Muslim close a door? He islams it.
Why did the Muslim man cross the road? To violently rape an eight-year-old girl, then indoctrinate her with Islamic scripture, and train her as a suicide bomber.
I lost my black friend in the shadows. I lost my white friend on the wall. I lost my Asian friend in the sand and I lost my Islamic friend in the bombings.
What do you call a Muslim guy in a bathtub?
A bath bomb 💣
I would like to die like my Islamic father, in his sleep, but not like the rest of the people in the plane or those in those identical towers.
Muslim child to his mother: "Mom, why is my backpack so heavy?"
Mom: "Allahu Akbar, my son, Allahu Akbar!"
Looking out for becoming a pilot, can y'all suggest some good mosques?
Don't want to learn the landing part, though, Allah said it's unnecessary.
"A llahu Aks into a bar..."
And it blows up!
What do you call a Muslim in a swimming pool? A bath bomb.
My friend asked me once, "Is there any religion in the world that preaches a god who masturbates in a closed room?"
"Islam it is."
Why won't an atheist convert to the religion of Islam? Because being on the sex offender list is the only requirement to be a Muslim according to the Arabic religion of Islam.
What do you call a drunken Muslim?
Mohammered.
Why doesn't a Muslim girl like her dad and namaz?
Because she has to get on her knees.
When you want to commit suicide, just say "Allahu Akbar," there will definitely be a blast.
What did Allah say when he created the universe?
-Allahu akbar!!!
What’s my favorite Islamic Holiday... 9/11.
What do u call a Muslim praying: Allahu akbar.