What did Captain Picard say when he brought his sewing machine to the repairman? – “Make it sew.”
Spock went to the enterprises toilet and he knocked on it “Kirk are you in there?” Spiked asked, Kirk answered “hold on i am making a captains log”
*Titanic was sinking. Passenger: How far are we from land? Captain: Two miles. Passenger: Which direction? Captain: Down.
Why do Pirates say “Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!” ? First time out at sea, they prepare for battle and say to their commander: “The canons be ready Captain!” “Are” says the Captain (correcting their grammar) “Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!” they all exclaimed !!