Wordplay jokes
What do you call an expert fisherman? A "MASTER-BAITER".
911, what's your emergency?
Me: My grandma just passed out in the living room and I think she's dead.
Well, it's not a living room anymore.
Me: Hangs up.
If a bike is also called a bicycle, then what is a test also called?
A tEsTiClE!
Q: What do you call a clean idiot? A: Soap on a Dope.
A panda goes to see a hooker. He goes down on her, he mates with her, he ejaculates and then he attempts to walk away.
The working girl asks, "Aren't you going to pay me?"
She opens the dictionary to "Prostitute: One who sells sexual companionship for money."
The panda picks up the dictionary and turns to the definition "Panda: A marsupial who eats, roots, shoots, and leaves."
How does Moses make his cup of tea?
He brews it.
What do you call 4 Mexicans stuck in quick sand?
Quatro Sinco.
Which mineral is impolite?
Ironically.
Let's taco about something.
Does Eminem like M\&M's? Cause if he didn't, that would be like "they're" not liking "there."
Do you know what the F in Orphan stands for?
Family.
Yo momma so dumb, the doctor wanted to give her a blood transfusion but she said no because she thought it would turn her trans.
I had an animal pun contest today. He started off by saying something. I don’t remember.
Then I replied, “TOUCAN play that game.” He went silent, and my other friend barged in and said, “Don’t you think he’s CHICKENing out?” I said, “Yeah, just stop HORSING around!” He came back with one, and I ended it by saying, “Ok, let’s MOOOOOve on cow.”
Welp, that’s it.
Why can't orphans be gay? Because then they would be home-osexual.
What do you call a pessimistic Mexican? A Mexican't.
Spell 'Imap' and say 'ness' at the end.
Why did the rapper bring a dictionary to the party?
So he could drop some WORDPLAY.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
Why was Balls afraid of Magic?
Because Magic eight Balls.
Teacher: Hey Timmy (the quiet kid), what comes after X?
The quiet kid: Splosion.
Teacher: What comes after A?
The quiet kid: AK-47.
Teacher: Faints.