Will jokes
What will you call Burj Khalifa after 100 years?
"Bujurg" Khalifa. (Just a joke)
If you put a million monkeys at a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program.
The rest of them will write Perl programs.
I hope Death is a woman.
That way, it will never come for me.
My fortune cookie said, "Your existing plans will succeed." Not necessarily, since I'm suicidal...
Do you know why orphans can't get married? Because they will never get their parents' blessing.
Why can't an orphan play basketball?
Because no one will be cheering them on.
I was working at a check-in station for a flight to Riyadh when suddenly I was approached by Benzema, Kante, and Neymar!
At first I was very surprised and curious, so I asked them why they decided to play in the Saudi Pro League and not MLS where GOAT Messi plays. They all smiled and happily replied: "Don't you know, the legendary bench warmer PRISTIANO PENALDO plays there!"
Now I fully understood what they meant! They know that Pristiano is already finished, so winning trophies will be easy for them. I smiled and happily let them through.
Knock knock.
Who is there?
WE WILL ASK THE QUESTIONS!
Q: Why should you never invite an aardvark to your family reunion?
A: Because it will eat your "aunts."
Why is Afghanistan good at chess? They take the rooks out fast.
What is the biggest fear of an American soldier taking a piss in a bush during the Vietnam war? His manhood will be chopped off.
Guy 1: Hey, can you stop making 9/11 jokes? My dad died during it.
Guy 2: Sorry, I will stop. What was your dad?
Guy 1: The pilot. He saw a KFC and wanted it, so, well, you know.
If a cat or a dog plays Among Us, it will wanna be the impawstor.
The devil's number is 346 because you will be in jail.
They say we will have eternal life when Jesus is no longer coming.
I want to tell you a joke about 9/11... but I'm afraid it will be the bomb.
Given that it's a major guarantee that little boys' underwear will be half off at Kmart thanks to the blue light specials, now you know why Michael Jackson likes to loiter around the store all day long.
Q: How many emo kids will it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: None, they all sit in the dark and cry.
Dad: Ok kids, this selfie will just be me! *screen cracks*
I'm always willing to go down on a handicapped girl.
Momma always told me to eat my vegetables.
*WARNING* THIS WILL NEVER GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD - READ IF YOU DARE.....
What came first? The chicken or the egg?
Which came first? The color orange or the fruit?
Who taught the first ever teacher?
If you expect the unexpected, doesn't that make the unexpected expected?
If you describe something as 'indescribable', then haven't you already described it?
In the word 'scent', is the silent letter the 's' or the 'ce'?
Why do your lips touch when they say the word 'separate', but don't touch when you say the word 'together'?
How many photos do you think you could be in the background of?
The guy who discovered cow milk, what was he doing with that cow?
Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, "Oh no, it's a cop"?
Is it possible to cry underwater?
If two left handers have an argument, who is right?
I warned you!! You just didn't listen.... :O