Weapon jokes
True fact: School shooters aren’t dangerous to you if you're the school shooter.
Why are ninjas' farts so dangerous? Because they're silent and deadly.
What do people have a shot at when it comes to love? Shooting them in the heart.
So put your best face on everybody, pretend you know this song everybody.
*pulls out noose* "COME HANG!"
*pulls out gun* Let's go out with a bang... Bang- *gunshot*
What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you?
Pull the pin and throw it back.
How does a non-binary ninja kill someone?
They slash them.
Q: Why does Pewdiepie prefer knives over guns?
A: Because knives don't have barrels.
What's a crazy man's favorite phrase when he has a knife?
"Freak out!"
What's a bison's favorite gun?
A PP Bizon.
Last year, I gave my brother a BB gun for his birthday. He gave me a T-shirt with a bullseye on it.
I asked him what the bullseye was for. He said, "Target practice."
I taped a picture of Bill Cosby to my gun, now it's an assault rifle.
I went fishing with my grandpa, and my fishing line caught the attention of a school of fish. I told him to get my gun.
A black man said, "Where are the young ones?"
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair?
RCXD.
What's a gun's favorite type of literature?
Magazine.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special forces.
What's a lesbian's favorite weapon?
A finger-gun👉👌
A hunter shot holes into his favorite book.
When confronted, he said it was the "holey" Bible!
Someone handed me a knife the other day and told me that it was very smart.
I made sure it didn't outsmart me.
What is Jesus' favorite gun?
A nail gun.
There were three Indians that got kicked out of the tribe.
One said, "Me find food," and he came back with a decent size rabbit. The other two asked him what happened. He said, "Me see rabbit, me shoot rabbit, and rabbit fall down dead."
The 2nd Indian, "Me find food." He came back with a good sized deer. The other two asked him what happened. He said, "Me see deer, me shoot deer, deer fall down dead."
The third Indian said, "Me find food." He came back crawling, missing a leg and an arm, and he was all cut up. The others asked what happened. He said, "Me see train, me shoot train, train no stop!"