Weapon jokes

I know this isn't an orphan joke, but I didn't know where to say it, so yeah.

I threw a nut at the allergy table and screamed, "YES, TRIPLE KILL!"

I'm gonna blow out your lungs faster than Joe Biden thinks is possible with a 9mm.

POV: You are 7 years old and you find a stick. SWORD.

Name what guns are used for. {wrong answers only?}

Q: Why does Pewdiepie prefer knives over guns?

A: Because knives don't have barrels.

I asked a man if I was the fastest gun in the west. He said my 17 wasn't good enough. After that, a lot of lead went into his head.

Mommy, Mommy, are you an archer?

"Shut up and keep the apple on your head still."

Why does Aaron eat burgers on a Wednesday? Because his spine is bent, and his favorite gun in Apex Legends is the G7 Scout, and he uses the speedy Spanish man.

How does a non-binary ninja kill someone?

They slash them.

Someone handed me a knife the other day and told me that it was very smart.

I made sure it didn't outsmart me.

What do you call a terrorist on a wheelchair?

C4.

Bring out your weapons, people.

It's bullying time.

True fact: School shooters aren’t dangerous to you if you're the school shooter.

What’s the difference between a life and a nuclear bomb?

I don’t have a life.

Q: How do you punish a blind person?

A: Give them a gun and tell them it's a hairdryer.

So put your best face on everybody, pretend you know this song everybody.

*pulls out noose* "COME HANG!"

*pulls out gun* Let's go out with a bang... Bang- *gunshot*

Why are ninjas' farts so dangerous? Because they're silent and deadly.

What do people have a shot at when it comes to love? Shooting them in the heart.

What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you?

Pull the pin and throw it back.

What's a bison's favorite gun?

A PP Bizon.