Sword

Sword jokes

Punch

How I Punch my Brother: Wooden Sword.

How he is telling Dad: Diamond Sword.

How hard my Dad is gonna punch me: Warden Punch.

Crime

Ricardo Medina, one of the former red Power Rangers, pleaded guilty to killing his roommate with a sword.

Pirate

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel attached to his dick.

The bartender asks him why.

And the pirate says:

"Argh, It's driving me nuts."

  • 8
  • Memes

    Draw

    My boy, I think it is about time that I leave this world. Now draw your weapon and kill me now!

    *draws a picture of his "epic" sword*

    "What... WHAT... WTH ARE YOU DOING SIMPLETON? I DIDN'T MEAN THAT KIND OF DRAW!"

    Pirate

    Why do Pirates say "Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!"?

    First time out at sea, they prepare for battle and say to their commander:

    "The canons be ready, Captain!"

    "Are," says the Captain (correcting their grammar).

    "Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!" they all exclaimed!

    Paul Walker

    When they say you live by the sword, you die by the sword, not in Paul Walker's case. He lived by the car, died by a tree. Well, I guess the car was stumped.

    Knight

    What did the knight say to his younger brother? "Good night."

    You expected a silly pun there, didn't you? That's pretty rude. It makes light of the struggles of being a knight. Especially a good knight.

    Pirate

    Why doesn't the pirate go to the strip club?

    Because he has ALL of the booty!

    Pirate

    A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his pants, a peg leg, and a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender says, "Hey, you’ve got a steering wheel on your pants."

    The pirate says, "Arrrr, I know. It’s driving me nuts."

    Pirate

    Why don't pirates take a bath before walking the plank?

    'Cause they just wash up onshore.