What does a gas grenade and a baby have in common?
They both squeal when you throw them.
Weapon Jokes
What do you call a kid in a wheelchair with a gun? RG-XD
If you thought other people’s puns are bad, well, you should sea mine.
I say 123, yeah, the kids bullied me, but they really don't know that my dad has a gun, yeah.
Why couldn't an orphan use a fighter jet?
Because he couldn't use the homing missiles.
What did Pepper say to Spray?
"Hey Spray, I'm Pepper, and I think we should fight crime!"
What’s the difference between a bullet and a prostitute? They both burst a barrel.
Why does Adam buy airsoft guns, you might ask?
To defend himself against his own father... his life must be shit.
A man from France, a man from Britain, and a man from New York are on an expedition to the Amazon Forest. After a while, they get lost.
So as they are walking, suddenly the bushes jump up into the air and men with spears are there. One man says, "Hey, you're in our sacred land. So what we are going to do is skin you and then use your flesh to make canoes. But we aren’t that crazy so we will let you choose how you die."
The man from France said, "Bring me the poison." The man from Britain said, "Bring me the gun." And the man from New York said, "Bring me a gun as well!"
The guy was confused but still brought the items and gave them to them. The guy from France said, “For the France!” and drank the poison and died. The man from Britain said, “Long live the queen!” and shot himself and died. And the man from New York started shooting and laughing like a mad man and said. 3 men lived through this and one said to the others, "Well...sh!# that didn't go as planned."
When I was younger, I thought that it was cool to use knives because kids used to ask me to use them.
By the way, have you seen my sister?
A man tried to attack me with milk and cheese—how dairy!
Why did everyone dislike Little Johnny at school?
'Cause he pierced everyone's livers with a .357 magnum.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special forces.
Q: What gun does Africa not have?
A: Water gun.
I gave a blind kid a gun and said it was a hairdryer.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Bum.
Bum who?
Bum holding a pistol!
What do you call an autistic kid with a minigun?
Special forces.
What's the POINT in stabbing people?
HAHAHA
Why did the boy shoot the clock?
When the school shooter runs out of ammo: K a l m.
When he grabs a full mag: P a n i k.
When he looks back and doesn't see you, but you're hiding in one of the classrooms: K a l m.
When the autistic kid's Sketchers light up: P A N I K.
