Weapon jokes
A teacher is teaching a class algebra. Timmy, you've worked out it is AK, but what is 59 minus 12? Timmy shakes his head, not knowing. The teacher asks, "How about AK 49 minus 2?" Timmy replies with um... The teacher becomes frustrated and yells, "What comes after AK, Timmy!?" The white kid at the back stands, shouts 47, and pulls the trigger.
I gave a blind kid a gun and told him it was a hairdryer.
What do a bullet and a police officer have in common?
When a bullet kills someone, it gets fired.
What do you call a country with nukes?
Abomination.
Guy feels something on his back.
“Oh God, please let that be a rifle.”
“Nope. I’m just real happy to see you.”
When one just isn't enough
What's the difference between a gun and my will to live? None, they are both absent.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special forces.
What should you use to battle a T-Rex?
A dino-sword.
I walked into a store, and I pointed a stick to the roof and said, "This is a stick up!"
Q: What did I find on my son's search history?
A: Where is the nearest gun shop?
Last year, I gave my brother a BB gun for his birthday. He gave me a T-shirt with a bullseye on it.
I asked him what the bullseye was for. He said, "Target practice."
I taped a picture of Bill Cosby to my gun, now it's an assault rifle.
I went fishing with my grandpa, and my fishing line caught the attention of a school of fish. I told him to get my gun.
A black man said, "Where are the young ones?"
What's a gun's favorite type of literature?
Magazine.
What do guns and women have in common?
They both get cocked and loaded.
What do you do when you run out of carpets? Fetch your shotgun and look for Explain Bear.
Chuck Norris once stabbed the Terminator with Bruce Lee.
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair?
RCXD.
A hunter shot holes into his favorite book.
When confronted, he said it was the "holey" Bible!
What's a lesbian's favorite weapon?
A finger-gun👉👌