Wait jokes

If a fly loses its wings, is it now a walk? Wait a minute, I found out a mind blower. So the 🌎 is the 3rd planet from the sun, doesn't that mean all countries are called the 3rd country of 🌎? If I get 10 likes, I'll do one mind-blowing fact daily.

Bully: Hey virgin!

Victim: I'm not a virgin, just ask your sister.

Bully: I don't have a sister, dumbass.

Victim: Just wait nine months.

A beautiful woman is on the ledge of a bridge about to commit suicide.

A homeless man walks by her and says, "What are you doing?"

She says, "I'm going to jump!"

The homeless man says, "If you're going to kill yourself, do you wanna have sex with me first?"

The woman replies, "No way, creep! Never that!"

The homeless man doesn't seem bothered and says, "That's fine, I'll just wait 'til you're at the bottom."

My girlfriend told me she was leaving me because I keep pretending to be a Transformer. I said, "No, wait! I can change."

How do you keep a homophobic heterosexual man that is a minister and a Christian nationalist with blond hair in suspense?

Wait until Christmas to take away his church's tax-exempt status or he will call the ACLU.

What do you call a crowd of horny white women?

A field of cotton waiting to be picked.

Friend: Want to play Fall Guys?

Friend 2: Yup.

Friend: Ok, so let me ju- wait, where are you going?

Friend 2: I'm gonna jump off.

Friend: Why?

Friend 2: We are playing Fall Guys, right?

Kid: Mum, how do you know someone is drunk?

Mum: See the four birds over there?

Kid: Huh, wait a minute.

Mum: A drunk person would see eight.

Kid: Mum, but there is only two.

I told my new girlfriend that my mother is deaf.

So she would have to speak loudly and slowly.

I told my mother that my new girlfriend is disabled. Now we wait.

I bought my son a fridge for Christmas. I can't wait to see his face light up when he opens it.

I can’t believe it’s been over a year since Kobe decided he’s too good to wait in traffic.

A man was in a courtroom. The judge said, "What should this man's punishment be?"

A random guy yelled, "Off with his head!"

The judge said, "He shall give head to every man in this room."

The guy yelled, "Wait, that's not what I said!"

I was watching my boyfriend's dog while he took a shower. I started playing fetch with him when the ball went over the balcony. He went to get it and fell 10 stories. When I looked down, he appeared to be dead.

My boyfriend loved his dog and I didn't know what to do, so feeling awful, I sat on the couch and waited for him to come back. About three minutes later he got out of the shower. He ordered some food and went to the table to eat when I said, "You know, your dog's been a little depressed lately..."

I thought I saw Jojo Siwa... no wait, it's your hairline.

My wife cheated on me with my brother.

She didn't have a sister, so I improvised, and now all I have to do is wait nine months for one to come.

Why'd the chicken cross the road?

A: To get to the gay (guys/girls) house.

(Wait awhile) then ask “knock knock?” Other person says “Who’s there?”

A: The chicken.

Everyone: So, wait, let me get this straight. Feminists want to cancel Father's Day because it is offensive to single mothers.

Feminists: Correct.

Everyone: Then what the f*** is the point of Mother's Day?

How many Michael Jacksons does it take to screw a light bulb?

Oh wait, Michael Jackson only screws little boys, my bad.

I got my daughter a fridge for her birthday.

I can’t wait to see her face light up when she opens it.

Should I buy COVID-19 or wait until COVID-20 comes out?