Roses are red.... Violets are blue... I feel like I'm gonna get raped next to you
bloodyboi
hey I'm Braden nice to meet ya, i like to draw, roleplay, and costplaying, sad and alone..
Boy goes to Confession Boy " What are you doing father" Priest "Its called masturbation and soon you will be doing it" Boy " Why do you say that father" Priest " Cause my hand is getting tired" -not my joke
When the school shooter drops his gun and the autistic kid picks it up thinking it’s his long lost nerf gun.
A man was in a courtroom. The judge said, "What should this man's punishment be?"
A random guy yelled, "Off with his head!"
The judge said, "He shall give head to every man in this room."
The guy yelled, "Wait, that's not what I said!"
A man walks into a bar and orders three shots. "Long day?" the bartender asks. "Well... My oldest son just came out..." The man finishes the shots and leaves the bar. The next day, the man comes back and orders four shots. "What now?" the bartender asks. "My middle son just came out." The man finishes his drinks and leaves. He comes back the next day and orders five shots. "Again?" the bartender asks. "Yeah. My youngest son." He drinks his shots and leaves. The next day, he comes in again. This time, he orders ten shots. "My God! Is there anyone in your family that likes girls??" the bartender asks. "Yeah... My wife."
What do you call an LGBTQ person getting grilled? LGBBQ.
Yo momma is so fat when she got on the scale it said, "I need your weight not your phone number."
Whats red white and blue, and crawls up your leg? A homesick abortion
My mom always said garlic powder makes everything better so i sprinkled some on my divorce papers and my wife's broken leg.
Americans: Miles per hour Europeans: bullets per kid
Why is there a lot of whites in hockey? It’s the only other job that involves beating something black other than being a cop
what is another name for 9/11? a forbidden game of jenga
what do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair? An RC-XD
My grandma walked up on my doorstep and I grabbed my bible... I thought she was a smurf...
Your hairline is like Mr. Clean's....Non existent......
Yo mama so stupid, she bought a solar powered flashlight.
Yo mamma so fat, her cereal bowl has a lifeguard.
Yo mamma so stupid, she brought a spoon to the superbowl.
What is my most popular side of myself?
Suicide.
I'm pretty sure that 9/11 was the biggest game of Jenga ever recorded in history.