Violence jokes
Why did the orphan kill someone? Because it would make him wanted.
I saw this kid who looked depressed, so I threw a torch at him. I thought I would brighten up his day.
What does lmao mean?
Launch Missiles at orphanage.
Me: Hey, that's a really heavy bag, do you have a lot of books and magazines in there?
The Quiet Kid: Yeah, magazines.....
Officer, I drop-kicked that child in self-defense!
You gotta believe me!
There is no meme, Whip out your cock
If I had 10 dino nuggies and Jamal tried to take one, I would have ten dino nuggies and Jamal's head.
When you get mad, just punch an orphan. Who are they going to tell? Their mom?
Today was a bittersweet day...
Bad news is my friend was assaulted. Good news is I successfully sneak attacked someone!
"Lizzie Borden took an axe. And gave her mother forty whacks. When she saw what she had done, She gave her father forty-one."
Studies have shown that in London, a person is stabbed 24 times a second. Poor bastard!
People say killing two birds with one stone is a good thing, but when I did it, people just looked horrified.
They can't say no if they're unconscious.
So, I was in the church the other day, raping this woman, when she screamed, 'Please! Think of my children!' I said, 'Ooo, you kinky bitch.'
How many times does 42 go into 9?
Get in the van to find out.
Roses are red, I have free candy, get in my van, I have a gun handy.
Never break someone's heart, they only have one. Break their bones instead, they have 206 of them.
How many babies does it take to paint a barn?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
What's the difference between anal rape and a microwave?
A microwave won't brown your meat.
Mary's mother was a good person. Why did she die?
Because she got stabbed in the heart 60 times by a switchblade.
What do pedophiles and Sandy Hook have in common?
Shooting up schoolchildren.