I saw this kid who looked depressed, so I threw a torch at him. I thought I would brighten up his day.
What did the pencil say to the sharpener? Please grind me!
Roses are red, violets are blue, if you take Kirby’s food, he will stab you.
Why did the orphan kill someone? Because it would make him wanted.
Are you George Floyd?
Cause you take my breath away! 😮💨
If I had 10 dino nuggies and Jamal tried to take one, I would have ten dino nuggies and Jamal's head.
What does lmao mean?
Launch Missiles at orphanage.
Officer, I drop-kicked that child in self-defense!
You gotta believe me!
How many children can you fit in a box?
Maybe five if you have a trash compactor.
They can't say no if they're unconscious.
How many times does 42 go into 9?
Get in the van to find out.
Roses are red, I have free candy, get in my van, I have a gun handy.
What’s the difference between football and rape?
Women don’t like football.
How many babies does it take to paint a barn?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
What's the difference between anal rape and a microwave?
A microwave won't brown your meat.
Mary's mother was a good person. Why did she die?
Because she got stabbed in the heart 60 times by a switchblade.
What do pedophiles and Sandy Hook have in common?
Shooting up schoolchildren.
How can all rape be prevented? Just teach your daughters to never say no to a man. There - fixed!
What song do you think was playing at the school?
"Pumped Up Kicks"
I got a phone call from a guy labeled "assassin" saying my life will end soon. I seriously doubt that he w- *gunshot*
