Violence jokes

Kid starts short-coming people in school. Teacher asks, "Why are you doing that?"

He responds, "I wanted to paint the walls red for Christmas!"

How do you make a pink Smurf?

You peel the skin off.

What does a dead baby look like?

I don't know, I close my eyes when I masturbate.

Some kids at school made fun of me for playing Halo. I gave them a halo.

I punched you so hard that I'll call you "Droppy Pussy."

If you see a woman get raped, don't bother helping. After all, they are independent and need no man.

Cheer on the rapist if you want.

What's the difference between Isaac Newton and the baby I just killed?

Isaac Newton died a virgin!😎

When is a rapist safe around children?

When his plans are oven ready.

Today my idiot brother screamed, "Ahhhhh, I'm dead!" But it wasn't really, so I decided to make it a reality until my sister came...

AND HELPED ME! - for once, but then two minutes later my mom showed up. We killed him right in front of her, and she screamed! "Donuts and pizza for you and more if you go to Mrs. Roberts' house and say hi and bye to Daddy!!!!!" And she hands us both a sharp tool, and I say, "What about Tommy??!!! Aren't you MAD!!!!!!!" Then she replied, "Who's THAT!!??? Coz he ain't mine. His name is Tommy, Tommy Roberts."

So then me and my sister visit Mrs. Roberts, and she said, "Oh, this isn't anything important. Go home!" So then my sister and I say hi! and do a countdown. After that my Nike white jumper had turned red! IT WAS A MUCH BETTER COLOUR, MUM SEEMED TO APROVE AS WELL! 😊😊😊 But then the police question us where daddy was, so then Mom said....................... oh he's moved on! So then the police officer was like, "Ahem, ma'm where!" SO THEN I BELLOWED.......................... UP - UR -A##. And we got let off the hook, then we moved oh and we k!lled the cop 2 and oh did i meantion we HAD a maid, and a landlord and a cat but they were all 2 annoying so we got rid of them and now our new backyard is very smellyyy and i dont think there is enoff space to put muummy anymore so now i dont think sissy will fit either🧐 i will ask my neibour nessy she'll obviously say YES or ill........................................

ok like for part two☺☺☺

What has 6 legs, 10 arms, and 3 heads?

The Boston marathon finish line.

Due to the rising cost of ammunition, there will be no warning shots.

Serial murderer Ed Gein was famed for raping, killing, and skinning his victims.

When he was asked why he did it, he responded, "You don't know someone until you walk around in their skin."

They can't say no if they're unconscious.

My therapist once said, "time heals all wounds." So I stabbed him. Now we wait...

What's the difference between genocide and mass murder?

Genocide is racist.

Why do more women than men oppose abortion? Because they prefer not to get raped.

So, I was in the woods the other day raping this woman when she screamed, 'Please! Think of my children!'

I thought, 'Ooo, you kinky bitch.'

Bully: I'm going to hurt you so bad.

You: Well... your IQ is the same amount of teeth I'm about to knock out, so... you're so dumb that you can't even do that.

And your IQ is 5.

What's the difference between an American school and a shooting range?

My dick doesn't get hard at the shooting range.

What has 4 legs and 1 arm? A pitbull dog coming back from the kids playground.