Violence jokes
How many babies does it take to paint a room red?
Depends how hard you throw 'em.
How many babies does it take to paint a barn red? Well, it depends on how hard you throw them.
How did Sally die?
She got shot.
What's the difference between 13 dead babies and a skeleton?
There aren't any, there's 13 skeletons in my closet.
How are babies and watermelons similar?
They are both fun to smash open with a sledgehammer and eat the insides.
Memes
What falls from the tree first, the autistic retard or the apple?
The apple, because the rope caught the autistic retard.
I rule my women with an IRON FIST!!
Yeah, literally an iron that my fist is clenching against her face.
Three guys are escaping from North Korea through a tunnel.
The guards know that they are coming and will shoot them with paintball guns as a warning.
The guys show up and the guards shoot them.
The guys die because the guards used real guns.
Bro, imagine shooting a school for autistic people.
If a WOMAN gets RAPED, RUN INTO THE SECNE AND HELP HER.
There's nothing stronger than love, except for an M32 Rotary Grenade Launcher because fuck you and everyone near you.
Damn, the guy who made the "Whip/Nae Nae" song really made his cousin go Silento.
OnlyFans, but it’s me smacking your baby daddies with Twisted Tea.
Only Cans.
Why can't you run with a pencil in the hallway? Because too many people got killed!
Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.
Why did Joe get hit by a bus? Sally was driving it.
Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere!
Why'd my grandpa fall over?
'Cause I clapped his cheeks, fool!
The hardest part of picking up a hitch hiker is tying them up.
I saw some kids bullying a kid in a wheelchair. I grabbed the kid, pushed him down the stairs, and said, "GTA physics."
I think it was wrong for that school shooter to end his life at the scene.
He could have done some good by becoming some lonely lifer's bottom.
Little Johnny likes to play with toy guns.
Little Johnny paints them black.
Little Johnny went to a gun store.
Little Johnny made a big mess.
The cemetery people were getting paid.