Violence jokes

Why did everyone dislike Little Johnny at school?

'Cause he pierced everyone's livers with a .357 magnum.

So I punched an orphan...

What's he/she going to do? Tell his/her parents???

I suck on cups so START RUNNIN' CUPHEAD!

I need to go to the hospital because I'm getting shot by a PUN.

O-Block

Why did the little girl cry twice?

Because you wiped your shitty bloody duck on her favorite teddy bear.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Bum.

Bum who?

Bum holding a pistol!

What does a wife and a boombox have in common?

They only work when you beat them.

If you're ever bored, just punch an orphan because what are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

My wife told me to give her 8 inches, so I had to have sex with her 4 times and punch her in the nose.

What is scarier than a pile of dead babies?

The bottom one ate its way out!

When she says she wrestles, so you pull out your dick and she punches it.

How fast did Little Sally paint the barn red?

As soon as the bomb exploded on her.

My Dad keeps beating me and my mom. Please call the police. My name is Jacob Upchurch.

If you’re bored, punch an orphan.

What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

Hitler was talking about how to fight in WW2 when someone sneezed while Hitler was giving a speech, so Hitler yelled, "WHO SNEEZED ROW 1? DID ANYONE SNEEZE?" They said no, and Hitler shot everybody. Same for row 2 & 3, but in row 4 someone nervous said, "Me, I'm sorry." Then Hitler said, "Bless you."

POV: You're at school and you just enjoy your day.

Now once you found a bully and he said, "I will burn you in fire," then you just punched him out of the school and got detention. You escaped and walked home, but the bully came and ROASTED you. He threw you in the garbage, but you took off his clothes and even his underwear. You escape the bin and took a shower and had a good day after.

The ice cream man tried to murder me today.

So I was at a class at school, and then boom, explosion. Lots of dead.

I shoot at the people too, haha, goodbye class. Scary.

What's the POINT in stabbing people?

HAHAHA