Violence jokes
Q: What's the hardest thing about losing your virginity?
A: Making sure she doesn't wake up.
So, my best friend's boyfriend broke up with her, and she started to cry.
So I told her a "single" joke, then she said, "Go and fucking die, you insensitive bitch!"
I later said, "Ugh, fine, as your BFF, I will break his body for you—happy now?"
She said, "*sniff* yes."
When I was younger, I thought that it was cool to use knives because kids used to ask me to use them.
By the way, have you seen my sister?
Boy: "My girlfriend didn't dump me, I dumped her..."
Off the nearby cliff.
Why do black people only have nightmares? Because the last one who had a dream was shot.
What can you say to make a rape victim feel better?
"It will be over soon."
If you're bored, just go hit an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
When you get mad, just punch an orphan. Who are they going to tell? Their mom?
I was playing laser tag with my ex, but I (wink) didn't realize I had a real gun.
How many babies does it take to paint a barn?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
A kid told me to go get a dad, so I punched the kid. He went to tell his parents. Oh wait, he can't, 'cause he's an orphan, and orphans have no parents.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? One, you just need to throw it hard enough.
What does a baby and a grenade have in common?
They both make noise after you throw them.
Me and my friends were having a party the other day when some bitch came bitching about the noise. Thankfully, she was hot and had a nice ass, so it was enjoyable raping her.
The next day when I woke up, I found her body only half eaten. Her lower body was still intact, so I went for seconds to fuck off the hangover. Then I had breakfast. Her ass tasted good with some ketchup.
When the school shooter is just about to leave your classroom, and you think you're in the clear, but the Down syndrome kid says, "Goodbye."
How are school shooting victims and school shooting jokes similar? They never get old.
What's the difference between a cat and a human? About 500 bullets.
I never get school shooting jokes.
Maybe they're aimed at a younger audience.
What do you do when you finish a magazine at the hospital?
Reload and keep shooting.
What's the best thing about beating up orphans?
They can't tell their parents.