Jack and Jill went up the hill.
Jack fell down, his ass was bound, and Jill continued up the hill.
Jack came back and beat Jill's back, and he got the ultimate kill.
Violence Jokes
So, a man walks past a gun store and sees all the guns are half price. Then the man says, "Wow, school supplies are low this week."
I had sex with twins. Well, I think it was twins. All my rage victims look alike.
Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? Don’t worry, he woke up.
In my basement.
How it be when the new guy takes too long...
Hay Danny, it's me Johnny.
Johnny: Boss says to kill the guy in red. Point the gun at his head.
Danny: Ok, target locked. 3... 2... 1... bang.
Johnny: Danny, hope you did not get the man in red.
Danny: OH MY BRO FOR REALL.
If Will Smith had a revolver and said, "Who fucked my wife?" Chris Rock would say, "You don't have enough bullets, mate."
Hello, anybody, I've just shot somebody. I did it on purpose.
Today I donated my watch, phone, and $500 to a poor guy.
You wouldn’t believe the happiness I felt as he slid the pistol back into his pocket.
If you are ever mad, punch an orphan.
What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
You just shot an unarmed man.
Well, he should have armed himself then.
Are you a knife?
Because I want to deep throat you.
I was in the bedroom slapping your girl harder than Will at the Oscars.
My Crandall just be smashing more than you ON DA GIRLS, and he was slapping your girl last night harder than WILL at the OSCARS! ;)
What happens when an orphan is told that someone had found their parents?
They cry...
They scream... with joy.
"Oh wait, no, that wasn't your parents."
Orphan grabs a knife out of the kitchen, lets just say, the orphan didn't live to tell the tail...
I wish I was at a Western bar; then I would get shot.
What is white, then red, and is very fast?
My chainsaw blade.
If you're ever bored, just punch an orphan.
What are they gonna tell their parents?
What were my final words to Putin before I put a bullet through his head?
Answer: Putin, put out!
If you're ever frustrated, just punch them in the face. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What's black, white, and red all over?
A nun in a blender.
