My friend thinks he is smart. He told me an onion is the only food that makes you cry, so I threw a coconut at his face.
Violence Jokes
What does the school shooter do after shooting all the kids?
Shoot kids in them ;)
How to cure boredom:
If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
How did "Bloody Mary" become a thing?
Because her husband beat her bloody when she didn't stay in the kitchen.
Columbine High basketball team will never be good again after they lost their two best shooters.
*School Shooter Walks In*
That one kid who plays "Pumped Up Kicks" at max volume.
Mom, where are we going?
To your grandma's funeral.
Yeah, 'cause I 360 no-scoped that b*tch in the face.
I just competed in a wrestling tournament. The first guy hit me harder than my dad’s belt.
I bribbled a kid and he was bribbled hem so hard that his balls came off.
A special quote: “I was gonna slap that girl into tomorrow!”
Can I pin your corpse to a tree?
I once told an orphan to go big or go home. He replied, "I can't get home; it got bombed."
How do you make a body disappear?
You use an axe, black plastic bags, a forest, a shovel, and some ice cream because killing someone and chopping them up and digging holes in the ground and putting dirt over them is a lot of hard work!
P.S., I'm joking and don't condone these actions.
What do you get when you have a class of kids and a speeding car?
A 24 killstreak!
How do you kill a sheep?
You lamb shank it!
What do Americans call high school?
A shooting range.
Name what guns are used for. {wrong answers only?}
Sonic says if you're ever born, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Guys, I'm back...
Here's my joke:
What is blue and red all over?
Blood in the water of a shark attack victim.
Why is it okay to hit an orphan?
Not like they can tell their parents.
