Stone

Stone Jokes

Feminist

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but there will always be something that offends feminists.

  • 9
  • Dictionary

    I was in an argument with a "friend" at school. He said, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me."

    ...so I threw a dictionary at him.

    Crowbar

    Sticks and stones may break my bones, but a crowbar could do it so much quicker.

    Teenage girl

    What is the difference between American teenage girls and Muslim teenage girls? -- American teenage girls get stoned *before* they have sex.

    Pride Month

    I decided to visit Saudi Arabia with my girlfriend.

    She and I learned they celebrate Pride month by throwing stones.

    Memes

    Word

    Guys, don’t let nobody hurt you with words.

    Like someone once said, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.”

    Band

    These three men wanted to start a band. One had the idea to call them the Rolling Stones, one wanted to call them the Veggies, the other said, "Let's be the Cripples," as they all rolled away.

    Bird

    People say killing two birds with one stone is a good thing, but when I did it, people just looked horrified.

    Weed

    You should never try Afghan weed because people in Afghanistan get stoned to death.

    Boy

    Two boys are wandering in the woods, playing games.

    Suddenly, they come across a naked lady, and one of the boys starts running. The other chases after him and asks: "Why did you start running?"

    The boy replies with: "My mom said if I ever see a naked lady, then I would turn to stone. And I can already feel a part of me turning hard."

    Band

    What’s Stephen Hawking’s favorite band? The Rolling Stones.

    Mexican

    What do you call a couple Mexicans getting stoned in a bush? Buches baked breans.

    Lady

    Two boys were at a lake, and they went to a bush and saw a naked lady.

    One ran away, the other one followed the one who ran and asked why he ran. The boy answered, "My mum told me if I saw a naked lady I would turn to stone. I ran away because I felt something get hard."