Worst Jokes Ever
9/11 jokes are the bomb.
What do lesbians do while having their period?
They finger paint.
Roses are red, eggs come in a dozen, do I need to revive Hitler to teach you how to use a goddamn oven?
My wife is like a mirror.
I can never look at it.
Kid: "Hey, are you an orphan?"
Friend: "Yeah, but you are too."
Kid: "At least my parents wanted me."
What happened when your parents dropped you off at the orphanage? They got sued for littering.
Three men were captured by a tribe and tortured. The leader of the tribe tells them that they would live only if they could achieve one thing: They had to go out and find 10 pieces of the same fruit each.
The first person returned with apples. The leader said that he had to put all 10 of them up into his ass without making a sound, or he would be killed. 1... 2... he screamed.
The next person came back with grapes. 1, 2, 3, he counted up to 8, but began to burst out laughing; he was killed. In heaven, the first man asked him why he laughed if he was doing so well. "Well, I saw the third guy coming back with fucking pineapples!"
Yo mama is so ugly, when she took a bath, the water jumped out.
What's an orphan's favorite movie?
Spider-Man: No Way Home >:D
My little cousin's birthday was in a few days, and his mom said he wanted Hot Wheels. So I sent him a video of me pushing a paralyzed kid into fire and screaming "HOT WHEELS!"
Were you born on a highway? Because most accidents happen on the highway.
What's a rabbit's favorite song?
Hip hop.
As an Autist, I find these jokes really funny. Thanks for the early 13th birthday present, ya'll :>
Roses are red, my blood is too. I see a lot when I lost you.
A blind woman told me I had a big penis yesterday.
I think she was pulling my leg.
Billy: *spits out food*
Mom: BILLY! We swallow what we have in our mouths.
Dad: *looks at mom*
Mom: Shut up.
If you get it, you get it.
I saw my wife at the dam yesterday. Drat. I was hoping she might float a bit more downstream.
I was making sandcastles with my Nan, then my mum came in the room and took away the urn.
My crush: "I cut 4 inches off my hair yesterday." Me: "So?" My crush: "4 inches is a lot!" Me: "Oh yeah?"
What did the baby cow say to the mommy cow when he saw a hamburger?
"Mommy, is that Uncle Joe?"