Worst Jokes Ever
My wife said I didn’t listen to a single thing she says.
What a weird way to start a conversation!
I asked a black man on the street if a white person paints their face black, it’s considered racist, but if a black person paints their face white, will the cops treat them better?
What are the basic ingredients when a cannibal makes a sandwich?
2 slices of Brad.
What's the difference between sex and mental illness?
Most of Reddit has experienced mental illness.
I heard that cataracts are the third leading cause of blindness...
... the first two being politics and religion.
If a deaf kid swears in sign language, does his mom wash his hands with soap?
How do you describe a redhead with bad teeth?
Gingervitus.
How do you restrain a straight person? Give them a straight jacket.
How do you restrain a trans person? Make the trans vest tight.
Why is prostitution illegal?
Because when it comes to screwing people and taking their money, the government doesn't want anyone outperforming them.
What is a government mandate?
When Obama and Biden go out to dinner together.
What is the difference between the government and organized crime?
Only one of them is organized.
Two Indians are walking beside a river...
One reaches down into the mud and runs it through his fingers.
"The White Man was here."
"How can you tell?"
"We're speaking English, aren’t we?"
What did the trans woman say after finally telling her parents about her surgeries?
“It felt really good to get that off my chest.”
Sophia matched with a midget on Tinder.
Midget: Hey! What’s up?
Sophia: Well technically everything is, from your perspective!
I used to be in a special needs class, and the teacher sent a student (if you want to call them that) out to the hall for being late.
I asked her, "Why did you send James out to the hall?"
She said, "He was a little tardy."
I replied to her, "I thought they all were."
One time my dad was an orphan, so I questioned where he learned to parent.
Why are Black people getting stronger?
Because the TVs are getting bigger.
How do you know it’s a gay guy’s birthday?
Depends how hard they blow out the candles.
What is the best game for a deaf person?
Charades.
Why is there air conditioning in hospitals?
To keep the vegetables cold and fresh.