Worst Jokes Ever
Why do orphans play a lot of tennis?
Cause that's the only way they get love.
Old soviet joke.
"Who is your mother?" "Our great Soviet country." "Who is your father?" "Our dear comrade Stalin." "What's your greatest desire?" "Becoming an orphan."
Why do people come on here just to say that we should not be making these jokes? They literally look this shit up just to complain.
What do lesbians do while having their period?
They finger paint.
"I'm sorry" and "my bad" mean the same thing, unless you're at a funeral.
What did the cannibal do after eating all the vegetables?
Sold the wheelchairs on eBay.
1 minute silence for those who still think thoughts can't kill you.
Titanic, doing the polar plunge before it was cool.
I saw an orphan crying the other day, so I asked, "Where are your parents?"
God, I love working at an orphanage :)
What you breathe in is called oxygen, otherwise known as, "African food".
What do you do when an epileptic has a seizure in a bathtub?
Throw them some laundry.
One day, little Johnny woke up to get a drink of water. He passed by his parents' bedroom and noticed sheets bouncing. He asked his dad what he was doing. He said, "Playing cards." Little Johnny said, "Who is your partner?" Dad said, "Your mom." On his way up, he passed by his sister's room and noticed sheets bouncing around and asked what she’s doing. She said, "Playing cards with my boyfriend, Paul." The next day, Dad came to ask Johnny a question. The father noticed Johnny was still in bed and asked him what he was doing. He saw the sheet bouncing and asked Johnny what he was doing. He said, "Playing cards." His dad asked him who his partner was. Little Johnny said, "You don’t need a partner if you have a good hand."
What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline?
You take your boots off before jumping on a trampoline.
What is the difference between the government and organized crime?
Only one of them is organized.
Your tits look heavy. Need help holding them up?
Free service for tit holding!
A blind man walks into a woman's bar and asks the person next to him if she would like to hear a blonde joke. The woman says, "Before you tell your joke, you should know the bartender is blonde and has a shotgun, the bouncer is blonde and has a baseball bat, the two playing music are blonde and have pistols. Do you still want to tell that joke, cowboy?" He thought for a second and said, "Not if I have to explain it five times."
My attitude doesn't have to be the only reason I yell and roll my eyes in the back of my head.
Fat people are the reason we have double doors.
Roses are red, your eyes are brown; never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down.
Yo mamma is so dumb that she smokes to burn calories!