Worst Jokes Ever
If a homeschooled kid kills his parents, is it considered a school shooting?
Where do suicide bombers go after death?
Everywhere.
What 7 letters do you say when you open the fridge and see it’s empty?
O I C U R M T
Why can't an orphan be gay? Because they don't have anyone to call "daddy."
Life is like a film; it goes on, but you can cut at any time.
The Twin Towers are like Angry Birds in real life.
If you were driving when all of a sudden a young kid and an old man run right in front of you, what do you hit?
The brakes, you sick bastard.
Please welcome Mozart's The Magic Flute...
In A minor.
Why did the orphan get an iPhone X for his birthday?
Because it has no home button.
I would tell you an orphan joke, ehh I’ll just tell your parents instead.
Do you wanna know how I recently seduced an obese woman? Actually, it was a piece of cake.
Yo hairline is so crooked it makes your gay best friend look straight.
Mother, father, and a son. Father purchased a robot that can detect lies. The robot slaps when you lie.
During dinner time: Father: Son, what have you done today? Son: I watched Netflix, Dad. Robot: Stood up and slapped the son! Son: Okay! Okay! I watched porn, Dad. Dad: What? You watched porn? You are only 14! I never knew porn till I was 18 years of age. Robot: Stood up and slapped the Dad! Mother: started to laugh and said, "Sure he is your son!" Robot: Stood up and slapped the mother!
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't make it to home.
One day, I was sitting on my couch watching YouTube when I heard a knock on the door. I opened the door, and to my surprise, it was my dad. I haven't seen him in 16 years, so I let him in. I noticed he had a gallon of milk in his hand, and he went to the kitchen and put the milk in the fridge.
Then he walked towards me and said, "Oh no! I forgot the cereal!" Then he walked out the door and drove away. I never saw him again.
Two boys came home for dinner late, and their mother asked, "Where have you boys been?" One of them replied with, "We were all over the neighborhood, we're mailmen now." Their snobby teen sister said, "Well, you're not real mailmen, real mailmen use real letters." Then one of the boys said, "Actually, we used real letters, we found a whole box of them under your bed."
Why do women hate having sex with midgets?
Because of their shortcomings.
I made a website to adopt orphans. But there is no home page.
You're so fat the only letters of the alphabet you know are K, F, and C.
Why does an orphan wanna be a criminal?
Because they wanna be wanted.