Time jokes
What do you call it when a caveman does a fart?
A blast from the past!
Why can’t you tell JFK facts about Dallas?
Last time he was there, he got his mind blown.
Yo mama's so fat that every time she goes on an elevator, it goes down.
I swear, if I compared the size of your mother and multiplied it by the time your dad was gone, it wouldn't even be close to your hairline.
Yo mama so old,
her memory is black and white.
You are so fat that the last time you stepped on the weighing scale, the doctor said, "I want your weight and not [your] phone number."
If 6 is afraid because 7, 8, 9, why is 10 scared?
Because it's in between 9/11.
Me: The last time I used Duolingo was when the dinosaurs went extinct.
Duolingo: Lemme send my twins 2 go 2 ur houze (I got sideways8 twins)
Okay, so one time a deaf kid got into a car accident, but he didn't herd in on the news.
What did the North Tower say to the South Tower in summer?
"Are you ready for fall?"
Is your hairline a time traveler, because it went way back?
I just beat the Hollow Knight and found it takes 26 hours to beat it, but it took me 69 hours to beat it.
The easiest time to add insult to injury is when you're signing someone's cast.
Your forehead is so big that it has five different time zones!
If 6 was afraid of 7 because 7-8-9, then why was 10 afraid?
'Cause it was right in the middle of 9/11.
Patient: Doctor, every time I look in a mirror, I feel ill, as if I'm about to throw up. What's wrong with me?
Doctor: I don't know, but your eyesight is perfect.
You know why morning food digests so quickly.
Because it breaks fast.
What do Karens do when they have free time?
They do KARENoke and sing a Karen song.
So I had an idea: you and a friend go bar (pub (whatever you call it)) hopping and propose to said friend in each one so everyone buys you free drinks and you get drunk and have a great time.
That autistic kid having sex for the first time:
"U The Hips, U The Hips!"