Technology jokes
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I was being interviewed by Elon Musk. He asked, "Where are you from?" and I said Portugal. He replied, "So you are a fellow countryman of a Pen merchant whose freekick ball broke my rover on Mars. Get out!!" Tears ran down my face. Shame on you, Penaldo, for costing me my dream job!
What did Stephen Hawking say when he died?
Boo Boo Doo.
Why can't orphans use iPhones?
There's a home button.
Why don't orphans have Life360?
Because parents won't track them.
Do you know what organ remains warm even after a woman dies?
My penis (or rather my neutron laser priming its firing sequence).
Grass is green. I am the queen. If only I can see you scream on the screen.
Things that rhyme with green, queen, screen: clean, between, been, ...
I made a website for orphans. The thing is, there was no homepage.
Why do orphans hate the internet?
Because on the internet, people have families.
Your nose is so big that Apple had to make a custom iPhone that unlocks using Nose ID.
I made a website for orphans.
It does not have a home page.
Joe Mama is so fat that when she sat on an iPhone, it turned into an iPod.
How does a computer spell "Autocorrect"?
What happens when you work in the Twin Towers? It connects to airplane WiFi.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Because his wife changed the Wi-Fi password.
How does Stephen Hawking have sex?
Enter, backspace. Enter, backspace.
This website is darker than the kid that got arrested last week.
Why can't an orphan have a website?
... No homepage.
Yo mama so fat that when she sat on an AirPod Pro, she turned it into an iPad!
Why can’t orphans have a computer?
Because they don’t have a home page.