What do you call a paralyzed turtle?
Shell shocked.
Why was the turtle looking at her phone?
She wanted to take a shellfie.
What do turtles and lesbians have in common? They both choke on plastic.
What did the taco say to the Sea Turtle? I like your shell!
What do turtles 🐢 use to communicate?
A shellphone!
What do a blonde chick and a turtle both have in common?
When they're on their backs, they're screwed.