What do you call a piece of tech that acts emo
Cutting-edge Technology
My friend asked, "What's that on your arm?" I replied, "Oh this, I didn't have enough storage on my phone to download Fruit Ninja so I had to improvise a little bit."
Sometimes I get jealous when my phone dies.
When Jim was playing on his phone, my grandfather told him, “You use way too much technology!”. Jim then said, “No, YOU use too much technology!” and then Jim disconnected his grandfather’s life support.
My Grandpa said, “Your generation relies too much on technology!” I replied, “We'll see about that." Then I unplugged his life support.
The other day at school we had to write down our hero and what we would do if they walked into our house. I got off easy because my hero is Stephen Hawking.
If I went to walmart, I would be able to scan my own wrists because they're barcodes too.
Stephen Hawking’s death was purely accidental. He clicked “shut-down” instead of “sleep”.
Q: Why can't science be combined with religion?
A: Cause science creates skyscrapers and planes, while religion combines them
The oldest computer can be traced back to Adam and Eve. It was an apple but with extremely limited memory. Just 1 byte. And then everything crashed.
Average Kid: brings mp3 to school
Rich Kid: Brings mp4 to school
Quiet Kid: Brings an mp5
What do you call a singing laptop? -- A Dell.
Where did the software developer go?! I don’t know, he ransomware!
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and the computer he's hooked up to? -- The computer runs.
What's missing in an orphanage computer?
"The mother board."
Q: How do you know when an Asian broke into your house?
A: Your math homework is done, your computer is upgraded, and 2 hours later he's still trying to back out of the driveway.
Why has Stephen Hawking stopped playing hide and seek with his wife? Because she keeps using a metal detector.
I have MP3s on my computer that are older than Johnny Depp's new significant other.
A wife and husband was setting up their computer and the husband makes the password my dick, but the wife fell on the floor laughing because the computer said the password was too short.
How do trees get online? -- They just log in.
