Son

Son jokes

Nun

    • Two nuns walk into a liquor store, and one asked the clerk for the biggest bottle of Irish whisky he had.

    The clerk replied, "Heck no sister, you nuns aren't supposed to drink that stuff!" The nun said, "Well my son, it is not for us, you see, it is for Mother Teresa," then the nun whispers, "She has the constipation."

    The clerk said, "Oh, in that case, it's on the house. Here's the biggest jug we have." The nuns thank him, bless him, and leave. A few hours later, as the clerk is leaving, he sees the same two sisters in the parking lot, rolling around and drinking the Irish whiskey. Appalled, he goes over to them and says, "You ladies lied to me! You told me it was for Mother Teresa for her constipation!"

    One of the nuns takes another swig, looks up at him and says "You wanna know something buddy? She sure will shit when she sees us!"

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    • Halloween

    • A father of five puts on a gas mask and a hazard suit and walks outside, but before he could make it, his son came and asked, "Dad, what are you wearing?"

    The father answered with, "A costume for Halloween."

    The child asked, "Can I join?" He said no, for he said it's their last Halloween. After that, I saw green smoke all over the same house they lived in.

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    • Son memes

    Robot

    • Dad: Son, do you want to play Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots?

    Son: Sure, let me get it from the closet.

    Dad: No, bring your sisters. Just like the game, they can’t move their legs.

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    • Dad

    • Son: Hi Dad, I'm Son.

    Dad: Hi Son, I'm Leaving You.

    Years later:

    Dad still did not come back.

    Dad

    • So my son came up to me and said, "Hey, Dad, I’m hungry." So I replied "Hi, Hungry, I’m Dad."

    And then I feed him my dick.

    Comeback

    • My mom told me, "You son of a b!tch." I told her, "I may be a son of a b!ch but at least I am not the bitch." She hated me forever.

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    • Father

    • A father and son duo are sitting at a table, eating breakfast. The father looks at the child and says, "I'm hungry." The child looks at the father and replies, "Hi Hungry, I'm Son." The father calls his father and asks why he was named Hungry.

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    • Barman

    • A person walks into the bar and said, "Hey barman, get my son a drink and tell him his dad is dead."

    Who said that?

    Virgin

    • Son to mother: "Mom, all the kids in the school are making fun of me because I am still a virgin."

    Mother: "Well, start giving them bad grades, and they will stop."

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    • Mom

    • A mom says to her son: "Hey, can you wave to that deaf kid over there?"

    The son: "I don't know, can I?"

    The mom: "May you?"

    The son: "No, I don't have any arms!"

    Name

    • Son: Dad, why did you name my sister Paris?

    Dad: Because she was made there.

    Son: Thanks, Dad.

    Dad: You're welcome, Backseat.

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    • Year

    • I tried to explain to my 4 year old son that it's perfectly normal to accidentally poop your pants. But he's still making fun of me.

    Cookie

    • So, I walked into the kitchen and saw my mom had made cookies. I stole one, not noticing my mom was behind me.

    So my mom said, "Put the cookie back, kid!" and I said I wasn't gonna eat it. Then she said, "Never mind, I'll get your father." So my mom said, "Honey, deal with your son; I'm going to the mall!" And my dad said, "Son, if you're not allowed to have a cookie before dinner!"

    So he went into his room, and I heard the belt, and I was going to run, but I knew it would be worse. So he said, "This will be your punishment." As he was getting ready to hit me, I said, "Daddy, no, please, I wasn't gonna eat it!" But he said, "No, you won't change my mind, little boy!" Then he hit me. Thank you for reading! Stay healthy and stay safe in this time. Bye!!! Read more of my jokes; they'll probably be around the website!!

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