My fondest childhood memory was building sandcastles with my grandfather. That is, until my mom took the urn away from me.
Orphan boy: "Your dad is probably disappointed in you. I mean, look at you." Me: "Well, at least my parents kept me. Where are yours?"
Two boys were arguing in class one day when the teacher walked in to the classroom. The teacher asked them, "Why are you arguing?"
One of the boys replied, "We found a ten dollar bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie."
"You should be ashamed of yourselves," said the teacher. "When I was your age I didn't even know what a lie was."
The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher.
*Im an orphan. lol
What was Stephen Hawkins favorite childhood song? The wheels on the chair go round and round.....
I had a huge crush on this girl when I was eight, one recess we met together on the playground and she brought me to the corner of the playground, that was my first kiss and from there it got serious. I told my parents a week later and they freaked out, called the police and they aressted my crush. I miss Mrs. Johnson
I was sitting with my little brother when he was about four-ish. He was starting to really like to identify objects for some reason, so he was showing me his toys. He grabbed his toy Mator truck and then pointed to the wheels, saying, “These are wheels.” I said, “Good job, yes they are.” Then he pointed to the bumper and said, “This is a bumper.” Again, I congratulated him. Then, he grabbed the toy’s wire with the hook at the end and said, “And this is a hooker.” I died laughing.
I remember when I was a kid i thought the world used to be colorless.
I was kinda right, they used to not let colors in a lot of areas.
A 10y.o. : I don't want to smile without having a reason to. People shouldn't think I'm happy 24/7. A 10y.o. week later: Damn... my life is shitty...
<2y. later> 12y.o. : What is de-pre-ssion? *googles it*
Now 14y.o. : Oh...
Apparently as a 4-year old, Hitler was saved from drowning in the river Passau by a local priest. Goes to show once more that a lot of problems would be solved if priests could just keep their hands off kids.
whats harder then steel Michel Jackson in an orphanage
Why did Michael Jackson like having little boys round him? He was studying for the priesthood
whats in a michael jackson hotdog
a 50 year old piece of meat
a 12 year old bun
I am Funny but sad. I submit jokes you'll love. Anyway...
Little Jimmy asked his mom if he could take a bath with her since he was scared if being alone. She said, "Sure, just don't look up." He looked up and said, "Woah, what are those?" She replied, "Those are just headlights." He looked down and said, "What is that?" She said, "That's just a bush." The next day, mommy wasn't home so he asked to take a shower with his papa instead. He said, "Okay, but don't look up." He looked up and said, "Woah, what is that?" His papa replied, "That's just a snake." Later that night, he asked to sleep with his parents. They said, "Okay, just don't look under the covers." After a while, he grew bored and went under the covers. Jimmy screamed, "Mom, turn on the headlights, the snake is in the bush!"
Name Something you practiced kissing on as a kid.
Sister SWEET HOME ALABAMA
Why did the orphan want to become a prostitute?
To get a daddy
What do you call an orphan who grows up and becomes a priest? Father Les.
What’s an orphans least favourite drink
Milk because his parents never came back with it
This is how my mom always threatens me: I brought you into this world, I can bring you out of it too. That's why I only have 2 siblings left.
I wonder where the bodies are?
Today I decided to go visit my childhood home. I asked the residents if I could come inside because I was feeling nostalgic, but they refused and slammed the door on my face. My parents are the worst.
