Father: I am taking your toys to the orphanage
Son:why
Father:you’ll need them there
I took my 5 year old son to ride some roller coasters, I think he didn’t like it, because I challenged him to a no hands contest. He said but I don’t have any. He wanted to know what dark humor is. Now he knows what it is and what it feels like.
My son came up to me and said, "Dad, I'm depressed". I pointed to the spare room and said, "Hang in there son".
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
mom tells her son to go to the other kid to walk to the kid just standing still to clap so the kid can hear and move out of the way of the car(but her son was blind the other kid had no legs so he couldn't walk and the kid has no arms so he couldn't clap and the kid died because he couldn't hear he was deaf)
Secretly, I’m a woman catfishing gay men on Grindr. When a notification from the app went off, my son told me, “I’ve heard that sound, daddy has that game too!”
I heard that to slow the growth of fire, you use a flame retardant. So I threw my stupid son in the flames when my house caught on fire!
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Johnny is walking along and a priest is coming the other way. Johnny says, "Hey, mister, why are you wearing your collar backwards?" The priest says, "Because I'm a father." Johnny says, "Yeah? Well, my old man's got three kids and he don't wear his collar backwards." The priest says "You don't understand, son. I have thousands of children." Johnny says, "You should wear your fuckin' trousers backwards."
How come I have a father but not a dad?
He was a priest.
A mother and son were in the backyard and the son finished building a shed. The mother says "You're the best husband ever"
the whole solar system is one big family right? but everyone circles the SON.
Girl playing outside: step on a line and you break your mommy's spine She then steps on a line and her mother keels over screaming
Girl playing outside :step on a crack and you break daddy's back She steps on a crack the mailman next door then keels over screaming
The husband starts celebrating gets in the car and starts to drive away
The son comes outside and steps on a crack
The dad then dies in a car crash
What does LGBTQ+ means is it the premium version of GAY
What did the Bull say to his son when he was going of to school? BISON!!!!
Dad: ok son if you fail this test your no longer my child ok Son: ok dad AFTER TEST Dad: hay son how'd the test go? Son: son?
I called prank called someone saying SON! ITS ME SON! IM COMING FOR YOU!!! my friend next to me asked who i was calling and I said the orphanage
🎆 New Year's Eve
Lil Johnny👦: „Every year the same, people always have to start banging before midnight“
Mom👱🏻♀️: „Johnny, would you please leave the bedroom now?“
Dad👨🏻🦰: „Son, if you don't leave, it‘ll bang on your head!“
I will never forget my grandpa's last words: "You still holding the latter son?"
A middle schooler and his dad were at a drugstore. The boy picked up a pack of 3 condoms and asked his dad who they were for. The dad said "they're for high schoolers: 1 for Friday, 1 for Saturday and 1 for Sunday." The boy then picked up a 6 pack of condoms and asked his dad who they were for. The dad said "they're for college students: 2 for Friday, 2 for Saturday and 2 for Sunday." The kid then picked up a pack of 12 condoms and asked his dad who they were for. The dad said "they're for married men: 1 for January, 1 for February..."
