Similarity jokes
What do a shopping cart and a wheelchair have in common? They both carry vegetables.
McDonald's called back and they said they want their logo back.
How are the Twin Towers and genders similar? There used to be two, but now it's a sensitive subject.
What does a glory hole and a confessional booth have in common?
A blowjob is anonymous.
What do a mag and a clip have in common? They are both good at school.
How are boobs and toys similar?
Both were originally made for kids, but dads usually end up playing with them.
What do Rapboat and Caseoh have in common?
They're both chubby.
Why do self-harmers "draw" on their arms?
Because everything they do is in vein.
Punchline: "Vain" sounds similar to "Vein".
What's the similarity between gay men and an ambulance?
They both take it in the back and go woop woop.
Say this out loud: Alpha Kenny One.
Your hairline is like Mr. Clean's... nonexistent!
Why did the bald man paint rabbits on his head?
Because from a distance, they looked like hare.
What are the similarities between BTC and 9/11? They both crashed down.
What's the similarity between your money and your life?
It just keeps going down.
Why are emo jokes so infamous?
They cut deep.
Why isn’t the Moon Emo anymore?
Turns out it was just a phase.
How many emos like anagrams?
Some.
What do you call those who remain My Chemical Romance fans?
Emold.
What is the connection between Emos and Darth Vader?
They both dress in all black and none of them has a father.
What do you call flat-chested emo?
A cutting board.
How many emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Who cares, let them cry in the dark.
Why did the emo kid leave the food on the table?
It was the Happy Meal.
Anthony went into the bakery and ordered Emo Cake.
“Emo cake?” says the baker. ”What exactly is it?”
Anthony says, “It’s the cake that cuts itself.”
How do you pull an emo from a tree?
Cut the rope.
What’s the similarity between emos and unsalted popcorn?
They’re both white and flavorless.
What do emo birds call their mouths?
Bleaks.
What do you call an obese emo teen?
An edgelord.
Recommended: Fat Jokes
What do you call a gang of emo kids?
Suicide Squad.
How are cats and emos different from one another?
The cat still has 8 other lives.
Why does emo get tattoos of fruits on their arms?
They are playing Fruit Ninja.
What will you call Sonic if he’s an emo?
Sonic the Edgy hog.
Why would the emo swallow a clock?
So he could wake up inside.
Why are Emos still around?
Because the suffering never ends.
What is the best way to get an emo off your balcony?
You encourage them.
What kind of bath bomb does an Emo prefer?
A toaster.
What is the favorite game of an emo?
Hangman.
Why do people wish their lawn grass was emo?
So it could cut itself.
A group of friends started an emo salsa band.
They call themselves HisPanic at the Disco.
What is the difference between pizza and emo pizza?
Emo pizza kind of cuts itself.
I don't like marriage. It's just like soup, as soon as you're done spooning it, it all cools off.
What do priests and McDonald's have in common?
They both stick their meat in 10-year-old buns!
What does a Travis Scott concert and the Titanic cabin have in common? The music doesn’t stop when people start dying.
What does a hooker and butter have in common?
They both spread for bread.
Q: What do women and KFC have in common?
A: Once you eat the breasts and thighs, all you have left is a greasy box to put your bone in.