Comparison jokes
Why does Royal Cola have more royalty than a queen?
Answer: It tastes better.
Yo mama jokes are so old, like your mom.
Bro, your hairline and an athletics track have one thing in common: they look like Humpty Dumpty.
"Can I throw you away? You look like my trash can. Oh, wait, you *are* my trash can."
When we talk of our X, some people talk of their XXX. 🤣
What makes Squidward and a Quandale Dingle the same?
They both got them big parts.
Leo might not be the dumbest person in the world... but she’d better hope they don’t DIE!
Your mom is so fat nobody can compare her to anything.
Your forehead is big. God said dude that's bigger than me and I'm infinitely big!
Q. What do Canadian women and Canadian beer have in common? A. They're both stronger than they look.
What's the difference between England’s football team and a tea bag?
The tea bag stays in the cup longer.
I am like Cookie Monster on steroids when it comes to cookies.
What’s the difference between a dad and a boomerang? The boomerang comes back.
Imagine me being 12 feet taller than your dad.
You're so skinny that a Wi-Fi signal is stronger.
I would call Slade dense, but that would be an insult to rocks.
The average Irish person consumes 131.1 litres of beer, almost as much as your mum at night.
"Float like a butternut, sting like a bee."
What’s the difference between God and Hitler?
God made thousands of bread, Hitler made thousands of toast.
I learned that humans eat more bananas than monkeys...
Huh, I don’t recall ever eating a monkey!