Shot Jokes

Michael Jackson goes to the doctor

Michael Jackson: Help doctor I've been shot. Doctor: I cant fix that but I can change your skin color so it doesn't happen again

I was walking in the forrest with my gf I had a desert eagle for protection A bear jumped out of the bushes one shot was enough to put my gf down and it gave me enough time to run away

How did the Emo kid bag all the cheerleaders? He hit them all when he started shooting his shot

how is a child molester and harambe the same, they both get shot for touching little kids

i was playing warzone last night and i shot my team mate that said they were emo and when i shot him another player did and it said assist kill

I was hit on by president kennedy, too bad i shot him down

I say 1 2 3 all the kids bullied me but now they're not so cool cuz I shot up the school

I wanted to solve Teen Suicide, so I shot up a Middle School.

My aim is cursed one of my angry birds hit a field

The last time I had flying lessons I hit some building in Manhattan. Then my Uncle got shot in 2008. Darn...

Me: Cobain! Friend: No, dude, its Kobe. Me: why? Cobain didn't miss his last shot.

Why do people who get shot in the head always becomes therapists?

They are more open-minded.

Once I almost died ill give it another shot out of the gun to finish my job

DARK ALERT******** a girl went 2 the doctor the doctor said she had 1yr to live she shot the doctor and the judge gave her 15 yrs. DARK ALERT********

When she saw her first strands of grey hair she thought she'd dye.

So, she went to see the "You Should Be Shot" - Photography Studio

A person in NYC is shot every 5 minutes. Poor guy.

Person: So you know that persons name you say when you make a hoop, well he's dea Friend: Yeah John Wilkes Booth Person: How dare you say that he killed Abraham Lincoln. Friend: Terrible guy but he never missed a shot

School is a lot like boot camp, the only difference is that you don't have to get deployed to get shot at

I love telling stories as theatrical plays. When we had a free dress day near Christmas my teacher dressed up as a reindeer, so I got my teacher involved...and shot her.