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View Jokes

Feminist

A feminist asked me how I view lesbian relationships.

Apparently, "in HD" wasn't a good answer.

  • 4
  • Shot

    John Lennon: "What a nice view."

    John walked outside.

    He got shot.

    :skull:

    Paper

    I was going to watch the origami world championships before it folded.

    But it was only on paper view.

    Memes

    Book

    What's a book never written? Beautiful sights by a mountain, by a rocky hill!

    Face

    When I see your face, there's one thing I want to change.

    The direction I'm looking.

    Heart

    The first thing a man looks at in a woman, is her heart.

    The fact that her breasts block the view is not her fault.

    Ass

    I look at my girlfriend’s ass like a homeless man looks at a trash can.

    Like it’s my next meal.

    Child Support

    A Mario & Luigi joke.

    What are the Mario bros' view on child support?

    Mario: The parents are obligated to provide for the child and help them the best they could.

    Luigi: LMAO I GOTTA GO!

    Twin

    The view is so much better without those twins covering the city.

    Well, that was a blow up!

    Javelin

    A new feature that we are bringing to the Olympics is 3D viewing. So if you're watching the javelin, I would look away now.

    Smile

    Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your smile's warmth, Lights up my view.

    Flag

    Me: *gives her 5 dollars* Climb that flag pole. Cute female: *takes the money and goes up the flag pole* Is this good? Me: Hell yeah, that's a nice view.

    *Next day* Here's 10 dollars if you do it again. *She goes up there* Me: How's the view? *She goes home and her mom sees the money* Her mom: Where you getting this money? Her daughter: I climbed a flagpole. Her mom: You know he just wants you to see your panties, right? *She goes back and does it again but doesn't wear panties* Me: Holy shit ;-; Her mom: Did you do it again? Her daughter: Don't worry, Mom, he didn't get to see my panties. Her mom:...

  • 1
  • Meme

    You know what's crazy? Is that the low taper fade, like, meme, is still MASSIVE. Still MASSIVE. Like, I'm still seeing like, new ones, that I've never seen before, and they're getting millions of likes and millions of views.

    Ass

    I'd like to see things from your point of view, but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass.

    Bridge

    Me: Why did the bus drop his ice cream?

    Sanity to live: I don't know?

    Me: He was run over by Timmy!!!

    Sanity to live? *dies*

    Me: *At edge of bridge* Wow, sweet view.

    Sanity to live: *resurrected*

    Narrator: Sometimes a bridge is all you need...

    (sponsored by jumping bridges)

    Host

    Why doesn't The View have anyone on it who is trans? They just look like they are.