Shot

Shot jokes

9/11

    • I hate jokes about 9/11... every joke has the tendency to crash and burn.

    "I didn't get the joke at first, but then it hit me like a plane," the joke was so dark a cop almost shot it.

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    • Shot memes

    Nightmare

    • Why do black people only have nightmares?

    Because the last one to have a dream got shot. (Martin Luther King joke)

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    • Problem

    • The doctor gave me one year to live, so I shot him with my gun. The judge gave me 15 years. Problem solved.

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    • Pattern

    • An American, a Cuban, a Russian, and a lawyer are sitting on a subway train, in the same seat. The Cuban pulls out a Cuban cigar for each person, and hands it out. The Cuban takes one puff of his cigar, and he throws it out the window. Everybody but the Cuban goes mad. "You just wasted an expensive Cuban cigar! How could you?" The Cuban simply says, "See, in Cuba, cigars are very cheap."

    The other passengers are reassured and respond with, "Oh, OK."

    The Russian takes out a small bottle of Russian vodka and pours a shot for all the passengers. The Russian downs his shot, and throws the vodka bottle out the window. The rest of the passengers are alarmed, once again. "You just destroyed an expensive bottle of Russian vodka! How could you?" The Russian simply states, "See, in Russia, vodka is very cheap." Yet again, the other passengers are reassured and respond with, "Ah, yes! Of course."

    The American scratches his head and goes, "I think I see the pattern here." So he takes the lawyer, and he throws him out the window!

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    • Kennedy

    • I named my daughter Kennedy so when I talked about how her brain was shot out of her head, people just thought I paid really close attention in history.

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    • Michael Jackson

    • Michael Jackson goes to the doctor.

    Michael Jackson: "Help, doctor, I've been shot!" Doctor: "I can't fix that, but I can change your skin color so it doesn't happen again."

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