Short jokes
What do you call a woman who thinks she can do anything a man can do? Wrong.
Did you know Disney is making a movie for suicidal people?
They're calling it Finding Emo.
I wonder if Stephen Hawking heard the song "Gangster's Paradise." Oh, shit, he can't!
So I became a teacher in a school for disabled children.
A kid wanted to ask me a question, so I told him to stand while he address me. 💀
How did the other 18 COVIDs go unnoticed?
What do you call a fat person in a wheelchair?
A broken wheelchair.
What's an orphan's least favorite day? Take your kid to work day.
Joe mama so fat she went wearing high heels and came back in flip flops.
What's the difference between WW2 kamikaze planes and 9/11?
One of the missions succeeded.
What song genre do the national anthems fit into?
Country.
Did you hear about that cheese factory that exploded in France?
There was nothing left but de Brie!
Are butt cheeks one word, or should I spread them apart?
abcdef ghijklmnop qrstuv.
I was an orphan as a kid, and I'm pretty sure my favorite thing was seeing parents with their kids.
I think we know why.
What do you call it when a white person beats a black person?
A KKKO.
Friend #1: "What's your favourite thing about trees?"
Friend #2: "Apples"
Me: "I can hang myself in them."
Why did the cloud apply to stormtrooper training school? He mist.
If the average male walks 1.7 miles a day, then why did my dad take 13 years to get the milk?
What similarities do peeping Toms and spies share?
They both see things they shouldn't.
It may be weird to let people smell your hair, but grab the phone as soon as the dwarf says your hair smells nice.