Short jokes
A gay couple walks into a Muslim bar. The tender flares up and says, “let me guess, a little blood on the rocks?”
Why is Jeffrey Epstein so bad at races?
Because he comes in a little behind.
I always win arguments against my handicapped girlfriend; she can't stand for herself.
I love big hot sexy men.
Why are pedophiles good at playing guitar?
Because they are good at fingering A minor.
What did the house painter ask when he went to the abortion clinic?
"Where do you keep the cans of paint?"
Where can you find the freshest vegetables? A school for the disabled!
Why was it cold in Stephen Hawking's house?
Because he had a new window open...
Me: What’s that girl’s name from Phineas and Ferb, the sister?
Crush: Candice.
Me: Candice dick fit in your mouth?
Crush: *slaps me, walks away*
What's Hitler's favorite Yu-Gi-Oh card?
BLUE EYES WHITE DRAGON
Dark humour : hell!!! Aren't people racist!!!
Your fat!
Yo mama so fat! When she jumps into a pool, NASA found water on Mars!
Why is rape, rape? Because she is too busy enjoying the moment to say yes.
A blondie and a redneck jumped off a building. Which one will land first?
The redneck because the blonde will ask for directions.
What do you call it when Batman skips church?
Christian Bale.
Why was 4 not impressed when 5 won a prize for 6?
Because 511472.
Why did the topless woman shout, "Stop raping us?"
Because she was uneducated.
They say nothing is impossible, but I've been doing nothing all day.
What is similar about a dog and a woman? You can ask them to come.