Short jokes
My best friend is an orphan, and we try to have sleepovers, but his parents never say yes.
The dear God created the man.
Then he created woman.
When he then saw what he had done, he took care of tobacco and alcohol.
How do you fit a hundred babies into a small bucket?
With a blender.
Why was Stephen Hawking's wife mad at him?
She caught him having an affair with his shoulder.
Why are you so bonely, my friend? I am at least glad that you are not boneless.
So I was visiting my friends Timmy and Tommy at the phone store and I said, "A. T&T!"
Did you hear about the midget astronaut?
He landed on Pluto.
"Hamlet deez nuts go into your mouth??" 😂😂😂😂😂
What’s the difference between Diana and Casper the ghost?
Casper can go through walls, Diana can't.
If your wife dies of childbirth, can you press charges on the baby?
Hey girl, are you osteoporosis, because you're giving me a "bone" condition.
Pornhub suggesting me MILF on Mother's Day...
What do you call a blind photographer? A waste of money.
What do you call a fish that doesn't play basketball?
My therapist said I have trouble letting go of the past. So I killed him.
If your daily is a Chevy, then your mom is super heavy.
Teacher: "I'll call your mother."
Orphan: "Go on, see if she picks up."
Dad: "I'm giving all your toys to the orphanage."
Kid: "Why are you doing that?"
Dad: "So you won't get bored there."
Someone asked me to go to hell, so I drove to my local middle school.
I know a baby carrot when I see one.