Short jokes
What do you call the midget sea?
A pond.
What is long and not hairy?
The conga line in the cancer department.
What is the difference between George Floyd and Kobe?
Kobe got air.
What is a cow's favorite class in school?
Moosic.
Why doesn't Kermit the frog get married?
He doesn't like commitment.
What's worse than ants in your pants?
Your uncle.
Hey girl, are your pants a mirror? 'Cause I can see myself in them.
Why did the emo go to the store?
To buy bleach.
Howard Stern rules, b*tches!
Sometimes my battery life has the same recognition as me :(
Want to know how to keep an idiot in suspense???
What do a priest and a pedo have in common?
Nothing, they both like kids.
I raped a disabled child.
I think she's too far gone to repair now.
Q: What do you call a cranky cow?
A: Moooooooody.
What's the difference between Madeline McCann and Batman?
Batman returns.
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite song?
"Highway to Hell."
I just killed a family of five.
Now I’m an orphan.
I was at a My Chemical Romance meet and greet that Gerard didn’t attend, I just thought... “NO WAY!”
What happens if a cashew falls down your shirt?
It becomes a chestnut.
9/11 wasn’t a terrorist attack, it was the world’s introduction to Sky Football