Short jokes
What do you call blue and orange at the bottom of a pool?
A baby with flat armbands!
A common question I get as a doctor is, do vaccines cause autism? Well!, I was vaccinated, so.....
You know I'm not too into black girls, but Kobe's daughter was smoking!
What's the difference between tuna, a piano and glue?
You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna.
Your momma's so dumb, she tried to climb Mountain Dew.
Why did a woman believe she was a target? She had a price tag without any value to it.
If a clown farted, would it smell funny?
Do you know why the Royal family can no longer play Monopoly?
How do you think Princess Diana died?
...Too soon?
Why did the moderator of worstjokesever.com die?
He had a heart attack because he was a fat loser.
What did the Nazi order from Wendy's?
Two number NEINs.
Why would hunting a bald eagle in America be a bad idea?
Because it's ill-eagle.
Don’t have phone sex without protection, you might get hearing aids!
What's the difference between pussy and pizza... nothing because I'll eat them both.
What's big, green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree, it can kill you?
A pool table.
Which one of Lord Arthur's knights invented the round table?
Sir Cumference.
gae
The Columbine High School basketball team hasn't been the same since they lost their two best shooters.
Why aren't women taken seriously in the world? They are too busy whining about getting raped.
Why did Annie fall from the swing?
Because she had no hands.
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
Not Annie.
Q: What do American beer and canoes have in common?
A: Fu@king close to water!