Short jokes
Why can’t you have a proper conversation with a gay person?
They’re never straight with you.
What’s a priest's favorite sport?
Golf, because most of the holes are less than 18.
What is another word for a bagel? 🥯
Jewish doughnut ✡️ 🍩👏 👏 👍 👍 👌 👌 💪 💪 😋 🏆 🎖
Fat person: "Hey, what's up?"
Friend: "Your blood pressure!"
Motivational Quote for today: If you're feeling tired and ugly today, cheer up, you probably won't feel tired tomorrow morning...
What's black and sits on top of a staircase?
Stephen Hawking's after a house fire.
Why is Santa's sack always full?
Because he only comes once a year.
It only takes 4 inches to please a woman.
And it doesn’t matter if it’s credit or debit.
What's the difference between a Syrian kindergarten and an ISIS hospital?
I wouldn't know, I'm just the drone operator.
How do you know a woman is blind?
Because she can’t see the kitchen or the laundry.
Why were the Twin Towers traumatized about eating?
After someone said, "HERE COMES THE AIR PLANE(s)," it just wasn't the same..........
What's the difference between Batman and a Black man???
Batman can go out at night without Robin.
"Pull down your pants, pull out my willy, stir your guts round like a hot bowl of chili."
Q: What do you call a Chinese billionaire?
A: Cha-Ching!
Your hairline was sponsored as a Snap Chat Filter.
I asked the librarian if the library had any books on paranoia.
She whispered, "They're right behind you!"
"White people can't jump..."
"You must not have seen the Twin Towers on 9/11."
My girlfriend called me a cocksucker, but hey, 20 dollars is 20 dollars.
I met an African girl the other night, we spoke for hours.
We just clicked.
Q: What's the difference between a nun and a woman in a bathtub?
A: One has hope in her soul and one has soap in her hole.