I would name my daughter Awesome so I can tell people that I'm fucking awesome.
Awesome Jokes
Grew up playing Fruit Ninja on my iPad. Spent time with my online sister playing multiplayer.
Now I play it in school with an awesome small steel blade.
I’m not allowed my phone during school hours and I have to give it in at the start of the day...
WOW this ultra realistic jenga is awesome!🔥🔥
Mom asks, "Why are you are THIS show??? It's DISTRACTING you from SCHOOL!!!!!"
The child says, "Don't you mean SCHOOL is distracting ME from this AWESOME show?"
Mom whispers, "Oh, you DEAD."
You're so awesome that the word 'awesome' demanded its title back!
Me, calls the police*
Me: Hey, I'm gonna commit suicide!
Cop on the phone: Please wait till we get there.
Me: Why, so you can then stop me?
Cop on the phone: No, we just want a murder, not a suicidal report on your paper... and we are all bored!
Me: Ok, my house number is *********************, ok!
Cop on the phone: Awesome! Just a sec. *whispers* Guys, I finally found someone who wants to get killed!
One time in my dream, I had a dream that all people in wheelchairs could walk. It was awesome; I could walk!
I've tried to like all of your jokes. They are funny 😆 and joshisboss, you are awesome. Keep up the good work 👍!
I have an awesome sex drive. My girlfriend lives 40 miles away.
Fortnite is good.
(Awesome joke, right?)
Biden is a joke. Trump is AMAZINGLY AWESOME!
Last Christmas was awesome, the whole family came.
I am awesome, look at me!
Why is September 11th an awesome birthday to have?
Because no one forgets it! :)
I'll give you an A because you're awesome.
B because you're beautiful.
A C because you're caring.
And I'll give you this D cuz you deserve it.
One morning a dad was sitting and watching TV.
His daughter comes in and says, "Dad! Why is my name Rose?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were born, a rose petal fell on your head." "Cool," Rose said.
The second daughter walked in and said, "Dad! Why is my name Daisy?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Awesome," Daisy said.
The third daughter came in and said, "DuUuUDeEeEeDrrrrrrrrr!!!" "SHUT UP, CINDER BLOCK!!!"
Koalas are awesome!
This rat did the most amazing thing ever; it was pretty radical, dude.
Morbius was awesome, and the Batman sucked.
Have you heard about the awesome fruit race?
The lettuce was ahead, but the tomato was able to ketchup!
