Short jokes
Every zodiac sign has a different hairstyle except Cancer.
What do you call a basement full of SJW's?
A whine cellar.
Where do math teachers go on vacation? Times Square.
KFC doesn't mean Kentucky Fried Chicken, it means "Kill Fat Children."
My dad and I were fishing one day.
That’s where he met my stepmom.
What is a ghost's favorite cake?
I scream cake!
What do you say to a depressed special kid?
“Why so down?”
What do you call an Indian lesbian?
Mingeeta.
Dad: What did you learn in school today?
Timmy: Not enough, I guess, 'cause I gotta go back tomorrow.
Why did the orphan try to get hurt?
Because then they would get surrounded with people who care about him.
He looks around, no one is there.
Jesus and Satan are just basically Homer and Flanders. One tries to help the other, only for Satan to just say, "Shut up!"
How do you know if spaghetti is a boy or a girl? It's meatballs.
An orphan? We no jokes.
Jokeless orphan since they were always stacked on jokes.
Playing Russian roulette alone means you're bound to be a winner eventually.
What's the difference between a bridge and a burrito?
I can't jump off a burrito.
Someone was throwing Stephen King books at everyone. I had no idea why though...
Then IT hit me.
Today we had a test on September 11th in school. I got a 9/11.
Mom: I'm getting you a dog!
Me: OMG REALLY?!
Mom: Yeah, what gender do you want?
Me:...
Me: Bitch, please.
What did they give Elmo before he left the factory? Two test-tickles.
Why does Sans say "I got a bone to pick with you?"
Because he needs to pick your balls.