Short jokes
How is a child molester and Harambe the same? They both get shot for touching little kids.
What's the difference between a wizard who raises the undead and a sexy vampire?
One is a necromancer and the other is a neck romancer.
My mom tells me to stop with the suicide jokes, and I replied with, "It's not that deep."
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett? Six hours.
For some reason, when my mom eats hot dogs, she likes to lick and suck on it first. As a son, can anyone tell me why?
Treat me like a joke, and I will leave you like it's funny.
I once called a depressed guy [to ask] why he loves ropes so much, and he left HUNGing on the phone. (I'm not English, so I could've talked bad.)
Yo mama is so ugly that your dad has to be drunk to bring her home.
What does Jeff Bezos do before he goes to sleep?
He puts his PJ-Amazon!
Why did the emo kid not cross the road?
He was waiting for a car.
Oh, Lois, that was more scary than Michael Jackson without pants in front of a kid!
What’s the best way to get people to remember your birthday? Kill yourself.
Yo mom's so old, she was happily accepted into the museum.
What is an orphan's favorite game? Sims, so they can make a family to have.
in can re;ate to this its always going through my mind
What did the plane say to the tower?
"Give me a kiss."
Your mom said, "Can you get to the dick game?"
Do people even like me, C. A. S. N. O. V. A.?
You look nice, and you seem like good fun, so if I give you this flower, will you finger my bum?
Your mom is so fat that when she went on the scale, it said, "I need your weight, not your phone number!"