Short jokes
in can re;ate to this its always going through my mind
Your hairline is so far gone that it looks like someone dropped a nuclear bomb on it.
They told me throwing babies was bad, but guess what I did yesterday? I threw my baby cousin down the escalator.
My fish died, and I didn't do anything. I just took my fish for a walk.
What is the only place fat people live?
Obi-city.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett? Six hours.
Viagra is a lot like amusement parks...
It's a one hour wait, for a two-minute ride.
what came first, The apple or the girl? The apple, because the tree left her hanging :)
Why is it annoying to eat by basketball players? Because they dribble all the time!
What’s the speed limit in bed?
It’s 68. Once you hit 69, you have to turn back around.
What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals?
Philipe Philope.
Everybody was kung flu dying.
It traveled as fast as lightning.
2020 was expert timing.
In fact, it was a little bit frightening.
I would tell a dad joke, but it already left me.
A cock really has a sad life. He's hairs a mess, his neighbor's an arsehole, his best friend is a cunt.
A kid asks his dad why his name is Experience. The dad says, "That's what we give our mistakes."
Do you like pudding? Pudding deez nuts in your mouth!
What do you call a Pirate Pokemon?
Arrrrrr-ceus!
I am the grand wizard, mak.
What does an apple and suicidal person have in common?
They're both hanging from a tree.
When rejected:
That's ok, the 3 other little pigs said no, too.