Short jokes
Why do witches wear name tags?
So they know which witch is which!
American soldier: "Did you come here to die?"
Australian soldier: "Nah mate, I came 'ere yesterdie."
What do birds and planes have in common?
They both fly into building windows.
I used to think that I had a Japanese friend, but it was just my imagi-asian.
What’s the most played song in Africa?
Have you ever seen the rain?
What is the most famous dish in Africa?
Don't know, they haven't tried it yet.
I got, I got, I got royalty inside my penis, or however the song goes.
Why couldn't George Floyd become a Demon Slayer?
Because he couldn't breathe.
Why does Santa come down the chimney? Because he knows he isn't allowed to come in the back door.
What is the speed limit for sex? 68, because if you go any faster, you’ll have to turn around.
Roses are red, violets are blue. Don't touch the beds, they are sticky with white goo.
What's an upside of being an orphan?
You'll never get grounded again.
What is the female version of t-bagging? A clam slapping.
What do you say to a feminist with no arms and no legs?
"Nice tits, bitch."
What do you call an under-the-weather seven?
A sick seven.
When the priest said, "Be gone from this boy, demon!" the demon replied, "And you get out of the boy!"
A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"Father replied, "I don't know, son. I'm still paying."
What's the difference between a Corvette and a pile of dead babies?
I don't have a Corvette in my garage.
What was Jesus's favorite sport?
Lacrosse.
What's the difference between a grenade and your wife? There's none. Take out the ring and half of the house is gone.