Difference

Anonymous

What’s the difference between England and a tea bag? – The tea bag stays longer in a cup.

Ball

Anonymous

Why was Cinderella banned from playing sports? – Because she always ran away from the ball.

Difference

Anonymous

Whats the difference between a hippie chick and a hockey player? – The hockey player showers after 3 periods.

Pants

Anonymous

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? - In case he got a hole in one.

Favorite

Wubba Lubba Dub Dub

What’s a lesbian’s favorite sport? Dodgeball

Shooting

Anonymous

The Somalian Olympics Team has just apologized to the Olympic Committee after realizing that sailing and shooting were two separate events.

Woman

Madison R.

A Blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer, who was also a blonde.

The Blonde Cop asked to see the blonde driver’s license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated.

‘What does it look like?’ she finally asked. The policewoman replied, ‘It’s square and it has you picture on it.’

The driver finally found a square mirror in her purse, looked at it and handed it to the policewoman. ‘Here it is,’ she said.

The Blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, “OK, you can go. I didn’t realize you were a cop…”

Country

Anonymous

What’s a Mexican’s favorite sport?

Cross country.

Favorite

Jets

What’s Al-Qaeda’s favorite sports team?

The New York Jets

Puns

Anonymous

I was wondering why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.

Burning

SSUNDEE'S BIGGEST FAN

WHAT BURNS UP A FOOTBALL STADIUM??? A FOOTBALL ’ MATCH ’

Puns

Anonymous

What do sprinters eat before a race? – Nothing, they fast.

Kobe

Okayasu_Nijimura

Me: Cobain! Friend: No, dude, its Kobe. Me: why? Cobain didn’t miss his last shot.

Ball

Eric Marco

What can you serve but never Eat. a volley ball

White

Mull

Where do find white people on a bench

  • the NBA

Favorite

Anonymous

What’s a Latino’s favorite sport? Lacrosse

America

Anonymous

What is a Mexicans favourite sport

Cross country

Cow

Anonymous

What is a cow’s favorite water sport?

Ca-MOO-ing

Girl

YeahImMessedUp

I know a girl in a wheelchair. I realize why now she couldn’t do sports because the coaches wanted 100% from her,but she was only able to give 50.

Wife

smartass

A man decides on a day that it is time to buy a pet. He goes to the pet store, looks around and sees a beautiful parrot, sitting quietly on a stick in his cage. Yet the beast has no feet and paws. “What is the matter with you?” the man thinks aloud. “Well, that’s how I was born, I’m actually a faulty parrot” says the bird. “Haha,” the man laughs, “it seems like that parrot understands what I’m saying and even answers!” “I understand everything you say, I am extremely intelligent and very well educated,” says the bird. “Well, if you’re so smart then tell me how you can stay on your stick without legs.” “Well,” says the parrot, “it’s a bit embarrassing, but okay, I wrap my little parrot penis around the stick, like a hook, but I hide that with my thick feathers.” “Wow, you really understand everything I say, do not you?” “Yes, yes,” replies the bird, "and I speak Spanish and English fluently, I can speak on a level about almost everything, politics, religion, sport and philosophy and I specialize in bird science, you should buy me, I am also a very good friend for you. " The man looks at the price tag, 200 euros is on it. “Sorry, I can not afford that.” “Psst,” whispers the parrot as he beckons the man with his wing closer. "Nobody wants me because I do not have legs, just bid 25 euros and you can take me with you." The man offers 25 euros and walks 5 minutes later with the parrot out of the store. A few weeks pass. The parrot is sensational. He is fun and interesting, gives good advice, is sympathetic to everyone, in short; the perfect roommate and friend. One day the man comes home from work and the parrot says “Pssssssssssst” while he beckons his wing again. The man comes close to the cage. “I do not know if I should tell you this,” says the parrot, “but it’s about your wife and the postman.” “What!?” says the man. “Well, the postman came to the door and your wife greeted him in a nothing disguised nightgown and kissed him flat on the mouth.” “And then,” the man hisses, “What happened then?” “Well, the postman came in, grabbed her nightgown and started caressing her everywhere.” “My God,” says the now furious man, “And what else did they do?” “Then he took off her nightgown, went through his knees and started to lick her everywhere, starting at her breasts and getting further and further down.” “And then, what happened, what else did they do?” the man screams . “No idea,” says the papgaai, “I got a boner and thundered off my stick …”

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